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Women Threaten, Fireworks = No Sex

By Wyatt Earp | December 31, 2008

<i>Monica, you're not a party to this, are you?</i>

Monica, you're not a party to this, are you?

Um, but isn’t sex the cause of “fireworks?” Someone has to set these I-talian broads straight.

ROME – Some women in Naples said they won’t make love if their men shoot off dangerous fireworks on New Year’s Eve.

“Se Spari, Niente Sesso” (If you shoot, no sex), as the group calls itself, claims to have signed up hundreds of women in the Naples area to combat celebrations that injure or maim hundreds each year.

“If you shoot, no sex.” Must . . . Resist . . . Wiseass . . . Comment!

Carolina Staiano, a mother of two, was quoted in La Stampa daily on Wednesday as saying she was inspired to create the group because her father was partially paralyzed in a fireworks accident. (H/TRT)

I wonder which part of him was partially paralyzed? What? I’m just sayin’.

Topics: Evil = Funny | 9 Comments »

9 Responses to “Women Threaten, Fireworks = No Sex”

  1. Earl Says:
    December 31st, 2008 at 10:28 pm

    The struggle between the sexes continues in all those languages, somehow I think there are some great romantic moves being made earlier in Italy, under the fireworks that someone else if shooting off. Have a happy New Year, your last one was enjoyed by me – but can’t you play more hockey in the new one? True, combative sports raise the male to new heights – and I will allow you to figure that one out. Take care out there, heard it is cold.

  2. RT Says:
    December 31st, 2008 at 11:04 pm

    See, I’d take part in that protest, but what’s the point…a little redundant, no?

  3. LuigiL Says:
    January 1st, 2009 at 1:13 am

    “Well, that’s fine, Andrea, I think I’ll stay with Lucia next door until you change your mind!”

  4. Wyatt Earp Says:
    January 1st, 2009 at 1:55 am

    Earl – I am cleared to play and will be on the ice on Sunday night. I just hope am not sucking wind after my first shift.

    RT – *zipping lip*

    Luigi – That’s the spirit!!!

  5. Glocksman Says:
    January 1st, 2009 at 6:55 am

    Better fireworks than the guns the Mexicans like to shoot into the air at midnight.

    Bullets do eventually land somewhere.

    That said, I wonder how long the women can hold out?
    In my younger days I worked fast food and the manager was telling us about the new Camaro her husband bought her.

    One of my female coworkers asked ‘What’d you do, threaten him with no sex?’

    She laughed and said ‘Hell no because I couldn’t handle that.’ :)

  6. Woody Says:
    January 1st, 2009 at 8:09 am

    Monica Belluci is one of the finest chicks on the planet… Need to watch The Matrix Reloaded again soon. The translucent dress is the most special effect in the film IMHO.

    Happy New Year!

  7. USA_Admiral Says:
    January 1st, 2009 at 9:15 am

    So this is a, no bang equals a bang?

  8. Wyatt Earp Says:
    January 1st, 2009 at 7:15 pm

    Glocksman – If you find a woman like that, MARRY HER AT ONCE!!!

    Woody – The red one? Friggin’ fan-tas-tic!

    Admiral – It’s an oxymoron. :)

  9. Dorkelina Says:
    January 2nd, 2009 at 4:11 am

    The Italians must have some pretty big fireworks, because the explosions coming from town here were more than enough to set my and Sgt. Bones’ teeth on edge. I can’t imagine what it was like for the guys who JUST got home, sheesh.