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Feces Throwing Monkey On Loose In Florida

By Wyatt Earp | January 15, 2009


Okay, I want an immediate location on Jim and USA Admiral! Heh.

CLEARWATER, Fla. – Wildlife officials said a rhesus monkey known to throw feces when mad is on the loose in Tampa Bay. Authorities have been trying to capture the primate since Tuesday afternoon, but it managed to evade a bucket truck and tranquilizer dart.

Hey, who among us can honestly say they’ve never thrown poo? I have been known to throw some feces when I don’t get my way, either.


Gary Morse with the Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission says the adult male is thought to have escaped from an unlicensed source. It was last seen in Clearwater.

The monkey is not considered dangerous. ()

Yeah, just wait until he slaps Mr. Morse in the face with some poo. Then the monkey’s “dangerous” status will immediately jump from “Zero” to “King Kong!”

Topics: WTF? |

8 Responses to “Feces Throwing Monkey On Loose In Florida”

  1. Deanna Says:
    January 15th, 2009 at 8:41 am

    Our local zoo had a monkey just like this. When we were little I dreaded walking past that stupid monkey. I HATE monkeys to this day!

  2. Diller Says:
    January 15th, 2009 at 8:54 am

    That was the BIG story on all our local Tampa Bay stations. World in turmoil,economy sucks,freezing weather, and a crap tossin monkey is the biggest news? More ridiculous was the dart gun guys,trying to get a clear shot.Next you hear will be how he leaped out of a tree and bit one of our local “Field Reporters”,maybe they can bring in Larry,Moe & Curley, and make it more entertaining.

  3. USA_Admiral Says:
    January 15th, 2009 at 9:36 am

    At my age you can’t throw poo.
    besides it is too cold to throw feces down here at the moment.

    “The Primate” LOL.

    Are you sure it is not Senator Bill Nelson; He is a poo flinging monkey?

  4. Wyatt Earp Says:
    January 15th, 2009 at 10:06 am

    Deanna - Monkist! :)

    Diller - Actually, biting a field reporter would be an awesome news story, in my opinion!

    Admiral - I think he only flings b.s.

  5. Doghouse Says:
    January 15th, 2009 at 11:33 am

    Somebody get a fan. I’ve always wanted to see that phrase come to life.

  6. kaveman Says:
    January 15th, 2009 at 11:47 am

    This brings up an important scientific question.

    Do angry primates who are prone to throw poo totally evacuate their bowels and toss the whole lot or do they have the forethought to just start a log coming out and pinch off handy little monkey-hand sized chunks?

    I think we should give millions of tax payer dollars to some university to study this further. Sure, we may have to cut funding for police and fire departments, but this is for science!

  7. AJ Lynch Says:
    January 15th, 2009 at 4:36 pm

    “Feces Tossing Monkeys”. What a great name for a blog or its commenters. heh.

  8. marvin Says:
    January 16th, 2009 at 11:12 am

    Clearwater, Florida is the current the capital of Scientology. This makes me suspect that it may not be a monkey, but Tom Cruise in desperate need for psychiatric medicine.