By RT | August 19, 2008
Here is a list of some decorum-raising “don’ts”:
1. Capri–If you’re leaving the beach, it better not be in your bikini. (Does that mean to walk around nekkid?)
2. Eraclea–You can’t display your sandcastle construction skills at this beach. Geez, the unions over here would be calling in their mob buddies. I’m just sayin’. (Really, I’m from Jersey and shouldn’t joke about the construction trade’s ties to the mob. It’s not good that I had neighbors and a landlord with ties, is it? Of course, I didn’t find out this information until I was an adult.)
3. Forte dei Marmi–You all might actually like this one: don’t mow your lawn over the weekend. (I like that law.)
4. Eboli (Ay-BOL-ee) not (EE-bol-eye to be confused with EE-coal-eye)…well, I was almost fluent in Italian, once; it’s all gone, now–In the town of Eboli, if you are caught smoochin’ or taking part in any other manner of romantic fun, you’ll be fined the equivalent of $745. You also can’t feed the pigeons. That’s another good law, actually.
5. Novara–Groups of more than two people cannot hang out in the parks at night. So, I guess you won’t be fined for smoochin’ unless it becomes a group effort.
6. Vincenza–A man was fined for lounging while reading a book in a park. (That mayor is working to drop that silly rule.)
Some of these are good, some are wacky; however, I think they failed to implement a few much needed laws:
1. Ban tourists from walking around and randomly belting out .
2. Vespas are no longer allowed to be exported to the United States.
3. Prohibiting tourists from standing near the Leaning Tower of Pisa for the “I’m-holding-up-the-tower” photo would be greatly appreciated. I’m tired of feigning amusement when I see the pictures.
Any laws you’d pass?