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Soccer It To Me

By Wyatt Earp | September 24, 2006

Can I brag for a second here? Today was my son’s first soccer game. He is one of two five-year olds playing on a 3, 4, and 5-year old team. Kyle’s green team was playing the blue team, and when the blue team’s five-year old girl started running circles around Kyle’s team, I started to get a little worried. This chick reminded me of one of those East German “women” you would see in the Cold War-era Olympics. One would think that’s a brutal thing to say about a five-year old, but it’s not like you guys don’t know I’m a jerk, right?

A few minutes into the game, Dracta lost some of her steam, and after dribbling the ball into Kyle’s end of the field, Kyle stepped up, stole the ball and went on a breakaway. He quickly ran towards the opposing goal and scored! The missus and I started to worry, though, because after watching so many World Cup games, we were afraid Kyle would run the length of the field with his shirt off. He did run the field, but, thankfully, he stayed clothed.

A few minutes later, Kyle stole another ball, dribbled it to the opposite end of the field, shot, and scored. He ran over and hugged his friend Jake, and the two joyously ran the length of the field. Could it get any better?


After the half – a short water break – Kyle stole yet another ball, took it the length of the field, and fired it toward Dracta (who they now put in goal). She stoned the shot, but Kyle scooped up the rebound and scored again for the hat trick!

About this time, the missus and I are hiding our faces with paperback books, since everyone MUST think Kyle’s a ball hog. He isn’t, and likes to “share” (read: pass) the ball, but he took his opportunities and made the most of them. Luckily, the coach decided Kyle could play goaltender for the rest of the game. All, in all, it was a pretty good performance from the boy.

Final score : Kyle3, Blue team0.

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