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Tyson Goes To College

By Wyatt Earp | February 25, 2006

Fox News reported that Mike Tyson was found in a University of Texas dorm. The embattled former heavyweight champion of the world apparently has decided to further his education, and I, for one, congratulate him. So few inner city products get such an opportunity, and Tyson’s experiences at UT may motivate other youths to follow in his footsteps.

Of course, one must wonder how Tyson will pay for his college education, since it is widely known that the champ has battled heavy debt. Perhaps his royalties from The Simpsons’ Drederick Tatum character have been rolling in. Either way, it does the heart good to see a bad kid gone good. Kudos, Mike!

Oh, what’s that? It was ricin that was found in the dorm; not Tyson. Hmm. I guess that lessens the confusion I had about how Iron Mike managed to hide himself into a roll of quarters.

Topics: Uncategorized | 4 Comments »

4 Responses to “Tyson Goes To College”

  1. The Man Says:
    February 25th, 2006 at 3:45 pm

    Dude, I remember parts of my college days. I saw biohazards every time I ate at the school cafeteria. Not to mention the stuff that was probably growing in the kitchen of the SAE house.

  2. rightwingprof Says:
    February 25th, 2006 at 5:09 pm

    I graded Tyson’s GED essay (he was in prison in Indiana, you know). It wasn’t pretty.

  3. Wyatt Earp Says:
    February 26th, 2006 at 1:58 pm

    The Man – Yeah. That day old hamburger made ricin look like Fun Dip!

    Prof – Was the topic entitled, “I Love Nestle Quik?”

  4. rightwingprof Says:
    February 28th, 2006 at 4:10 pm

    LOL! IIRC, he whined about what an awful life he’d had.