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“Exercise” My Demons

By Wyatt Earp | June 26, 2008

At this point, it’ll be forever until I look like this.

Well, I just came back from a five-mile walk. I have bumped up my daily routine from three miles to five, and I am feeling much better overall. Our Blogger Blubber Battle will end in four days, and in six months, I have lost 38 pounds.

But that’s just not enough.

Every time I walked past a parked car, I would glance at the window and see my reflection. The stomach – although smaller – is still there, staring back at me with that, “Yeah, you’re still a fat frak” look. It has really been bothering me the past couple of weeks.

I’ve always had a problem with self-image. And as you can see from Cowboy Blob’s photoshop above, I don’t exactly look like Brad Pitt – I look a little more like cherry pit. It was much worse when I was waddling around at 5’9″ and 236 pounds, but even after losing weight, there is only so much I can do with what God gave me: factory seconds. Even when people give me compliments – it’s rare – I usually don’t take them well. Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate them, but they just make me feel uncomfortable.

The same holds true for the blog. I love the readers, and love when you comment on some drivel that comes out o my warped mind. That being said, when people say that I have something akin to talent, I shudder a little. Part of me doesn’t believe it – let’s be honest, I’m a rodeo clown with a keyboard – and part of me doesn’t want to start believing the nice things people say. My head is already big enough – thank you, God.

I know what you’re thinking: Wyatt, what’s your point? To be honest, I really don’t have one, but I am tired, my legs are sore, and I’m feeling pretty sorry for myself today. I go through days like this maybe once a month. It must be the mental illness.

So, despite what you may think, this is not a plea for sympathy or even compliments. Save them for a decent post. Actually, I think I would rather y’all tell me what you don’t like about me or the blog. This way, we can get it all out of our systems for a few hours. I’ll post something better later on.

Topics: Weight Loss | 18 Comments »

18 Responses to ““Exercise” My Demons”

  1. Randal Graves Says:
    June 26th, 2008 at 6:12 pm

    “this is not a plea for sympathy or even compliments”….

    That’s good because I got nothin’ for ya.

    Nice pic by the way.

  2. RT Says:
    June 26th, 2008 at 6:22 pm

    Sides of cars = fun-house mirrors…buy a mirror. Well, I’m trying to not be nice since you don’t want nice.

  3. Snigs Says:
    June 26th, 2008 at 6:30 pm

    “I go through days like this maybe once a month. It must be the mental illness.”

    No Wyatt, you’ve started your “cycle”. :P

    Load up on Midol baby, you’re in for a bumpy ride.

  4. Miss Mud Puddle Says:
    June 26th, 2008 at 6:37 pm

    He should have made the color of your face match the color of your arms and legs…then you would have great self-esteem!

  5. FlutePrayer Says:
    June 26th, 2008 at 6:43 pm

    Yup. Sounds like PMS to me.

  6. RT Says:
    June 26th, 2008 at 6:58 pm

    Cure-all: K.C. Masterpiece chips.

  7. USA_Admiral Says:
    June 26th, 2008 at 8:20 pm

    I spilled the cup of water I was drinking when I saw that image.

    I know just what you need; it sounds like you need a visit from the ever friendly and a huge motivational speaker; Gunnery Sgt. Hartman, “What is your name fat body?”

    That is best mean I could come up with.

    Complaints:
    Not enough Sharapova pictures.

    That’s all folks.

  8. Cowboy Blob Says:
    June 26th, 2008 at 9:50 pm

    It’s not teh color, it’s da shadows!

    The body is high-lit from the left, the face high-lit right.

    Cringe-worthy!

    Gotta get working!

  9. marvin Says:
    June 26th, 2008 at 9:59 pm

    Little off topic. Are you planning on joining the cities new Gay and Lesbian Task Force? That would explain the pictures.

  10. Old NFO Says:
    June 27th, 2008 at 12:39 am

    Now THAT is called stream of consciousness (or unconsciousness) writing…LOL

  11. Ky Person Says:
    June 27th, 2008 at 8:10 am

    Wyatt darlin’ (I can call you darlin’ since I are an old lady), we all have issues with our looks. Trust me – you look just fine. I get compliments sometimes, and I think, “yeah, but what about my ginormous butt” (which I know is only ginormous in my own eyes).

    Anyway, just keep the battle going till you’ve lost as much weight as you want to. Keep up the walking – it’s good for you. I’m almost 60. I lost 40 pounds and 5 sizes 20 years ago and kept them off. You can do it. Yay Wyatt!!!

  12. Uncle Ray Says:
    June 27th, 2008 at 9:19 am

    Nephew o’ mine….don’t discredit your talents. You placed second in a recent bloggers’ poll. (Every other blogger tied for first!) Seriously, though, I admire your fortitude and weight loss. Wanna know how to celebrate??? Go get a Steve’s Prince of Steaks, cheez whiz, wit! And let the cheez whiz drip on to the top of your sneakers! You can always walk another mile next week!

  13. RFTR Says:
    June 27th, 2008 at 12:28 pm

    What we don’t like about you?

    I don’t like your whining. Suck it up, ya big baby. There’s no crying in blogging.

    Okay, I’m sure there’s a lot of crying at DailyKos and PuffingtonHost… but not here!

  14. marvin Says:
    June 27th, 2008 at 12:58 pm

    Another unrelated note. I get peppered sprayed with Fox tomorrow. Will my eyes burn more from that, or from this pic? Just wondering.

  15. dragonlady474 Says:
    June 27th, 2008 at 4:09 pm

    Something I don’t like? hmmmmm…. maybe too many girl pictures and not enough of Bruce Dickinson in tight leather pants. :)
    Whenever I feel bad or down on myself I always do something I’m good at to raise my morale. Maybe this would work for you on these types of days.

  16. Wyatt Earp Says:
    June 27th, 2008 at 9:59 pm

    Um, sorry about that kids. I have no idea what the Hell I was thinking. Despite what some naysayers may think, I know this:

    1. I am a fairly decent person.

    2. I’m much hotter now than I was six months ago.

    3. I am surrounded by good people who care about me.

    Anyone who doesn’t want two teaspoons of Wyatt every day is missing out. Their frakkin’ loss.

    And now, back to some good old-fashioned comedy . . .

  17. RFTR Says:
    June 27th, 2008 at 11:28 pm

    Surrounded by good people who care about you? What about those of us who are good people but love being critical of you? Don’t we count?

  18. Wyatt Earp Says:
    June 28th, 2008 at 10:57 am

    RFTR – Nope.