Every January I look back upon the holiday season with disgust. I usually spend those happy family moments stuffing my face with junk food and adult beverages.
By New Year’s Day I look like Jabba the Hutt, and decide to do something about it.
This year, I decided to walk. A lot.
A friend recommended a fantastic app to help me: Map My Walk. Using GPS, it tracks your distance, time, and calories burned. It has been a godsend. Yesterday, I received my six-month summary. While I haven’t walked as much recently, the numbers are pretty impressive.
I started the year at 205 pounds. I weighed in yesterday at 191, the lowest I’ve been since 1997. I still think I’m fat, but my bigger problem now is my cargo shorts with the 36 waist keep falling down. It’s a nice problem to have.
Are you a fat bastard? Do you have smaller people orbiting around you? Can you bend light? If the answer to any of these questions is yes, have I got a solution for you!
It’s easy to gain weight, but it’s exponentially harder to lose it. As you probably already know by now, crash diets won’t work. What does work is cleaning up your diet and adding more exercise into your lifestyle.
Then, of course, there’s Stink Yourself Slim.
Stink Yourself Slim is basically a stink bomb in a bottle, but you’re not supposed to use it to prank others. Instead, you’re supposed to spritz some and smell it so you’ll lose your appetite. It’s logical: the less food you eat, the more weight you lose. It was created by Alex Fontaine and was inspired by a real-life event when a skunk crashed a buffet and ruined everyone’s appetite.
The bottle retails for £29.99 (or $49 USD). Of course, you could hire a homeless guy to stand next to you for a fraction of that cost.
There hasn’t been a need for a weight loss update in a while, because I’m proud to say I’ve kept the weight off. After starting the year at a hefty 215 – I’m 5’9″ tall – I lost 25 pounds, dropping to a much-less hefty 190.
Now, when people mention how thin I’ve gotten, I merely respond with the phrase, “I’m less fat.” Maybe that’s not an appropriate response anymore. To wit:
A few weeks ago, I purchased a pair of cargo shorts from Kohl’s – they do good work. They shorts were a Tony Hawk brand, and despite the slacker image you may be getting, they are actually rather classy. I tried on a size 36 and they fit perfectly…
After two pretty terrible weeks diet-wise – I gained two pounds – I jumped back onto the healthy bandwagon. With authori-tah.
It paid off. I weighed in at 190 . . . my lightest weight since 1994!
I’m down 25 pounds since January, and if I can keep my head on straight – and my eyes averted from the junk – I can get below 190 faster than a speeding bullet.
It’s been a while since I last posted my weight, mostly because I’ve been stuck in the communion party rut. We had three parties in the last three weeks, and my eating has suffered a bit – but thankfully, not too much.
This week has been much better, between walking 3-4 miles every other day and keeping to my Weight Watchers points. This morning I stepped on the scale and saw this staring back at me: 191 pounds!
That’s down three since my last weigh-in, and down a total of 24 pounds since January 1st. BOOM!
It’s been two weeks since I posted my weight, and before you ask, no I haven’t given up. I simply forgot to post the number.
That said, I am sick as a dog this weekend – the cellulitis is back – and feel like death. So, I’m going with last week’s number just the keep the posts current.
Last week, I came in at 194, which was down a pound from the week before. The good news is that I have been walking and mostly making my Weight Watchers points.
I’m down 21 pounds since January 1st, and since the weather has gotten much better, I expect the number to drop significantly in the next few weeks. Wish me luck.
Because it’s certainly not in my midsection! The diet is continuing, and I am still working the Weight Watchers, but other factors contributed to my week in weight. Namely, my cold. I had been sick as a dog from Tuesday through Saturday, and it took a lot out of me. It also didn’t help that I only walked once while sick and barely had enough energy to get a mile in.
I still stepped on the scale, though…
This week’s result? 195 pounds.
That’s down two pounds from two weeks ago, and down a total of 20 since January 1st. Most notably, it’s the thinnest I’ve been since 2008.
While I’m starting to notice the loss – clothes fitting better, etc – my former co-workers noticed when I attended a retirement party for my former corporal on Friday. The most common comment: “Wow, you’ve lost a lot of weight!”
That definitely made me feel good, and it’s motivating me to keep going. Pretty soon, I’ll be comfortable enough to post a photo of myself here.
Okay, here’s what I don’t get. I made Weight Watchers points every day this week except one. On top of that, my physical therapist cleared me for walking, and I walked two miles three times this week. My clothes fit better and my confidence was boosting.
Then I stepped on the scale: 197 pounds… again.
What. The. Frak? I do all that for no loss? I’m three stinking pounds away from the lightest I’ve been in nearly ten years, and I’m getting held up? Friggin’ ridiculous.
I’m not even really frustrated about it; I’m pissed.
It’s hard to believe I look like a shirtless Hugh Jackman now, but what can I tell you?
Okay, I’m not nearly that muscular and my face looks like a frying pan, but I am slightly less fat than I was last week. Better still, the scale didn’t groan when I stepped on it this morning.
The result? 197 Pounds.
So I’m down 2 pounds since last week, and 18 pounds since January 1st. Also, I’ve been cleared by my physical therapist to start walking again, so I expect that number to shrink even more. 195 is the lightest I’ve been in ten years. I’ll definitely be under that soon. As for long-term goals, I’d be ecstatic if I could get to 185.
Considering the hospitalization of my wife and my mom in the last two weeks, I didn’t post a weigh-in last week. I’m doing so today, even though I had a few bouts of stress eating. No excuse, but it is what it is. Although in my defense, I did have two delicious tuna wraps from the hospital cafeteria on consecutive days. I just wish that would counterbalance the cheeseburger and the cheesesteak.
That said, I stepped on the scale this morning and found this staring back:
Obviously, I’m not happy with that number, but a loss is a loss. I’m down one pound since the last weigh-in, and 16 pounds overall.
Oh: Ranba Ral sent me an e-mail. He is down slightly, weighing in at 272, but he’s exercising every day. That’s going to help.