Archive for January, 2010
« Previous EntriesTrue Detective Stories
Sunday, January 31st, 2010Instead of boring you with endless dialogue, I figured I’d bore you with endless animated dialogue. This happened last week, and as always, this story is completely true. Enjoy!
Making “Light” Of The Situation
Sunday, January 31st, 2010Last week, the unwashed masses were abuzz with the story of “Ellie Light,” a lunatic who sent dozens of identical letters of support for President Barack Obama to newspapers across the country. This alleged grassroots effort was eventually exposed as a fraud, and the name Ellie Light turned into a national punchline. This broad (or [...]
Jessica Alba No Es Inteligente
Sunday, January 31st, 2010Get this: Jessica Alba wants to bring her daughter up right. Maybe not having her play a stripper in films is the way to go? Anyway, she wants her to become bilingual so she can connect with her “Spanish heritage.” Of course, that heritage may not exactly be rock solid because Jessica and her parents [...]
Austrian Ambulances: Pay As You Go?
Saturday, January 30th, 2010Austria is now implementing an ingenious tactic to cut down on health care deadbeats. Trust me, you are not going to believe this. Note to the Ambulance Driver: Here’s your next get-rich-quick scheme! VIENNA – On a ski holiday to Austria, remember to bring your boots, your hat and — on the off-chance you might [...]
Obama To Meddle In College Football
Saturday, January 30th, 2010President Obama is considering sticking his big nose into the college football playoff issue. And really, why wouldn’t he? College football’s BCS system is a matter of national importance, so much more than say, unemployment, the economy, health care, two wars . . . Dude, it’s enough. Seriously. WASHINGTON — The Obama administration is considering [...]
Baby, It’s Cold Outside
Saturday, January 30th, 2010It’s currently 20 degrees outside, so I figured I’d post a swimsuit babe to help with everyone’s global warming. Of course, Alessandra Ambrosio is more than a swimsuit babe – she’s a Victoria’s Secret model. Yummay! The 28-year-old Victoria’s Secret model is back to her hot bikini body after having a baby in 2008. Alessandra [...]
Weekend Caption Contest
Friday, January 29th, 2010Darth Wader Caption Contest (Source: Break.com) Enter your caption for this photo in the comments section, or e-mail me your photoshop entries. The winners will be announced on Monday, February 1st. Good luck! Other Current Contests: Blogs4Bauer Cowboy Blob (I WON here last week!) Family Security Matters Military Times Rodney Dill (I took 2nd Place [...]
Pork May Be The Key To A Good Porking
Friday, January 29th, 2010Finally! A reason to eat more bacon! BUENOS AIRES – Argentina’s president recommended pork as an alternative to Viagra Wednesday, saying she spent a satisfying weekend with her husband after eating barbecued pork. “I’ve just been told something I didn’t know; that eating pork improves your sex life … I’d say it’s a lot nicer [...]
Newsweek’s Howard Fineman: Idiot
Friday, January 29th, 2010One of Newsweek’s many left-wing journalists hacks, Howard Fineman really outdid himself this week when he said that President Obama’s SOTU speech should make him worthy of Mt. Rushmore consideration. Seriously. And people wonder why no one reads Newsweek anymore. Sister Toldjah has the hilarity: “If presidential leadership were only about giving speeches, the jackhammers [...]
Mary Carey Denied Wingette Status
Friday, January 29th, 2010What’s a Wingette, you ask? It’s a broad who serves as “entertainment” during the annual Wing Bowl in Philadelphia. For those of you outside the area, the Wing Bowl is a chicken wing eating contest hosted by local sports-talk idiot Angelo Cataldi. White trash morons compete in the contest, while the slobs parade around showing [...]
« Previous Entries