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Idol’s Adam Lambert Announces He’s Gay

By Wyatt Earp | June 10, 2009

<i>Really? This guy is gay?? Get out of town!

Really? This guy is gay?? Get out of town!

You know, I am pretty good at what I do. I pride myself on the fact that I’m a better-than-average detective. I can usually see things that others can’t, and spot a person’s secrets.

But I have to admit: This story really floored me.

LOS ANGELES, California — “American Idol” runner-up Adam Lambert confirmed publicly what he assumed everyone already knew: He is gay.

“I don’t think it should be a surprise for anyone to hear that I am gay,” Lambert told Rolling Stone magazine.

Wow, I am absolutely amazed. I really had no idea! /snark.

He said he is “proud of my sexuality” and never sought to hide it during the “Idol” competition.

“I embrace it,” he said. “It’s just another part of me.”

Still, he stayed silent when, in March, a picture of him, dressed in drag and kissing an ex-boyfriend, emerged online. Lambert told Rolling Stone he was worried coming out would “be so sensationalized that it would overshadow what I was there to do, which was sing.” (H/TCNN)

And how did that work out for ya, genius? Kris Allen beat you like a rented mule, and the irony of it all is that if you came out during the show, the sympathy vote would have put you over the top. Dope.

Oh well, at least it gives me an excuse to post a top ten list:

Top Ten Reactions To Adam Lambert’s Announcement
10. Simon Cowell purchased new designer bikini briefs!
9. A few “Lambert Troofers” demanded to see his birth certificate.
8. RT cried for three straight days.
7. Lambert was offered a walk-on role in the new “Transformers” film.
6. Makeup prices increased by 300 percent.
5. An angry Clay Aiken called him “Adam Shambert.”
4. Sonia Sotomayor described Lambert as a “wise non-Latina woman.”
3. Captain America has been motivated to come out as well.
2. Rush Limbaugh exclaimed, “I hope he fails.”

And the number one reaction to Adam Lambert’s announcement is . . .

1. I’m still posting without pants!

Topics: Snarkasm, Top Ten List | 17 Comments »

17 Responses to “Idol’s Adam Lambert Announces He’s Gay”

  1. 1oldleg Says:
    June 10th, 2009 at 8:15 pm

    I don’t care if Adam IS a one eyed willie washer, but I do insist you put your pants back on!

    That’s disgusting! Just the thought… ewww!

  2. RT Says:
    June 10th, 2009 at 8:42 pm

    Dangit! I thought the eyeliner was an attempt to bring back the hair bands! Next thing you know Rob Halford will announce he’s gay and a tell-all about Freddie Mercury will reveal the same. Geesh. Whatever you do, do NOT tell me that Ellen DeGeneres is a lesbian, because then I’ll have to rethink the idea that female comedians are just man-ish to be in the male dominated world of comedy clubs.

    (Will Lambert be borrowing your brother’s hat?)

  3. Typicalwhitey Says:
    June 10th, 2009 at 9:57 pm

    Well as for the pants thing……..Got any proof??


  4. Easily Lost Says:
    June 10th, 2009 at 10:08 pm

    Gay or not, the guy has a killer set of pipes on him. And I mean vocal pipes, in case your mind was still in the gutter.

  5. Raptor Says:
    June 10th, 2009 at 10:44 pm

    You post… without pants?!?!

    Ewww….. That’s an image I didn’t need…


  6. Robert Swick Says:
    June 10th, 2009 at 11:00 pm

    “1. I’m still posting without pants!”

    Except now you’ve got a woody?

    J/k. Funny list Wyatt!

  7. bob (either orr) Says:
    June 10th, 2009 at 11:01 pm

    Who is Adam Lambert and why should I give a rat’s rear end about it?

  8. solitary knight Says:
    June 11th, 2009 at 12:44 am

    You’re a DETECTIVE man.

    Find those pants!

  9. Alan B Says:
    June 11th, 2009 at 3:07 am

    7 Bob

    I second that motion. Who is he and why should I care?

  10. Rustmeister Says:
    June 11th, 2009 at 10:20 am

    Adam? Gay?

    Next thing you know, Clay Aiken will announce he’s gay too….

  11. Morgan Says:
    June 11th, 2009 at 10:21 am

    Still posting without pants, huh? Boy, you never cease to horrify, do you?

  12. Mike47 Says:
    June 11th, 2009 at 11:29 am

    OK, if you get to post without pants, I get to READ without pants!

  13. Mike47 Says:
    June 11th, 2009 at 11:30 am

    On second thought, that sounds really gay of me. Cancel, cancel, cancel.

  14. Woody Says:
    June 11th, 2009 at 9:03 pm

    Never watched the show. Sorry. He certainly looks gay though… not that there’s anything wrong with that.

  15. madz Says:
    June 13th, 2009 at 11:49 am

    who cares if he’s gay? american idol wasn’t a straight competition, it was a singing competition! the only reason he lost wasn’t because he was the second best singer, it was because everyone who believed that if you were gay u didn’t deserve it, or the ppl who really christian voted for kris.

    LIVE ON ADAM LAMBERT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  16. Bitter American Says:
    June 13th, 2009 at 11:57 pm

    Captain Obvious, call on line 2,…

  17. Bitter American Says:
    June 13th, 2009 at 11:58 pm

    Madz, actually believe AI is a singing competition?

    Mwaa-haa-haa! ;)