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Chad Johnson Is A Complete And Utter Tool

By Wyatt Earp | May 15, 2009


The Cincinnati Bengals wide receiver has officially changed his name. From now on, you can call him “Ochocinco.”

Yeah, he’s a big bag o’ douche.

CINCINNATI - Oh-oh, Ocho. The Bengals’ top receiver has yet another name.

The NFL had agreed to let the player formerly known as Chad Johnson wear his new name on the back of his jersey this season. There’s one catch for the receiver: It’s not exactly how he wanted it.

Instead of Ocho Cinco, he’ll be Ochocinco.

The receiver legally changed his name in Florida last August. He asked the league and the media to call him Chad Ocho Cinco, a two-word nickname he had adopted referring to his No. 85.

The league has agreed to let him wear his new name this year, but it will be rendered as “Ochocinco” because that’s how he wrote it when he submitted his name-change form in Florida.

“It’s his legal name,” AFC information manager Corry Rush said Thursday. (H/T - )

So, not only did this dumbass change his name to something insipid, but he also misspelled it, making the two words one.

Frakkin’ idiot.

Topics: People I Hate |

8 Responses to “Chad Johnson Is A Complete And Utter Tool”

  1. Rick Says:
    May 15th, 2009 at 10:58 pm

    I think he must play with out a helmet

  2. Raptor Says:
    May 15th, 2009 at 11:59 pm

    Actually, I think he should’ve changed his name to “Chad Dummkopf” Seems more appropriate, ja?

  3. Bob Says:
    May 16th, 2009 at 12:44 am

    Maybe he should wait till the bengals have a winning season before trying this kind of crap… Makes a guy embarrassed to be from around there!

  4. proof Says:
    May 16th, 2009 at 1:14 am

    Who’da thought that his last name and his IQ would coincide?

  5. Warm Mountain Says:
    May 16th, 2009 at 2:38 am

    Hours after my grandmother had my mom, a nurse came to her hospital room and asked her what name should go on the birth certificate. My grandmother slurred out, “Hallamae,” and Mom’s birth certificate was written as “Hallow Mae.” Sheesh. Years later my mom changed her name to the name she was intended to have: Hallie Mae.

  6. RT Says:
    May 16th, 2009 at 3:22 am


  7. cbullitt Says:
    May 16th, 2009 at 8:24 am

    That’s the funniest egomaniac fail Ive heard all week. But that’s largely because what Pelosi and Obama did wasn’t funny.

  8. Mrs. Crankipants Says:
    May 16th, 2009 at 3:47 pm

    I heard he gave himself that name so he could remember which jersey was his.