Recent Posts

Recent Comments


Cop Land

« Biden His Time Until He Misspeaks Again | Main | It’s The Unofficial Start Of Summer »

An Important Safety Tip For The Suicidal

By Wyatt Earp | May 24, 2009


Do not attempt to jump off a bridge in Guangzhou, China!

BEIJING - Chen Fuchao, a man heavily in debt, had been contemplating suicide on a bridge in southern China for hours when a passer-by came up, shook his hand — and pushed him off the ledge.

Oh, I’m sorry, but that’s friggin’ awesome! And yes, I know that I am going to Hell.

Chen fell 26 feet onto a partially inflated emergency air cushion laid out by authorities and survived, suffering spine and elbow injuries, the official Xinhua News Agency said Saturday.

The passer-by, 66-year-old Lai Jiansheng, had been fed up with what he called Chen’s “selfish activity,” Xinhua said. Traffic around the Haizhu bridge in the city of Guangzhou had been backed up for five hours and police had cordoned off the area.

“I pushed him off because jumpers like Chen are very selfish. Their action violates a lot of public interest,” Lai was quoted as saying by Xinhua. “They do not really dare to kill themselves. Instead, they just want to raise the relevant government authorities’ attention to their appeals.” (LINK)

After reading his comments, can anyone honestly argue with Lai’s reasoning?

I guarantee you one thing: Once this story gets around, a lot of people will think twice before trying to jump off a bridge. And if it saves just one person . . .

Topics: Evil = Funny |

3 Responses to “An Important Safety Tip For The Suicidal”

  1. Bloviating Zeppelin Says:
    May 24th, 2009 at 8:08 pm

    Yes, as you and I both know customarily these assholes just want attention and sympathy and, at that point, no one has been willing to listen due to their primary uselessness.

    Lai doesn’t lie.


  2. RT Says:
    May 24th, 2009 at 11:31 pm

    Funny in a very disturbing way.

  3. Wyatt Earp Says:
    May 26th, 2009 at 10:08 pm

    BZ - Good point. I guess this tool learned an important lesson.

    RT - When you get to Hell, mention my name: You’ll get a good seat.