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Oh . . . My . . . God!

By Wyatt Earp | October 21, 2005

“I, Katie, am willing to accept Tom’s demon seed.”

The final sign of the apocalypse is upon us . . . Katie Holmes is pregnant with Tom Cruise’s child.

“It’s a dream come true,” the actress said on the syndicated entertainment news show “Access Hollywood” Thursday. “I feel great, (being pregnant) is so beautiful. I’ve never been so happy. … I’m beaming.” She’s not beaming; that’s just the “aura” of L. Ron Hubbard shining through her loins.

Reports that the “Church” of Scientology told Katie that she feels this way have not been confirmed.

Does anyone have some holy water and a crucifix?

Topics: Babes | 4 Comments »

4 Responses to “Oh . . . My . . . God!”

  1. linda Says:
    October 21st, 2005 at 10:51 pm

    If I say FIRST, will it hack off the guys who usually say it? Just curious! I used to like Tom, now it turns my stomach to hear the gushing, TomCat names, etc! Pplleeaassee STOP! L Ron also decreed that pregnant women should have quiet births–no screaming during their drug-free deliveries! Right!

  2. SK Says:
    October 22nd, 2005 at 6:00 pm

    In regards to Linda’s comment…I think L Ron’s idea should happen just as soon as they give him a reeeeaaallly long colonoscopy, drug free of course:)

  3. GunnNutt Says:
    October 22nd, 2005 at 9:10 pm

    Do you think Tommy and Katie will star in what will surely be a future remake of Rosemary’s Baby?

  4. Tyler D. Says:
    October 23rd, 2005 at 4:15 pm