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Snooki: Not Dead

By Wyatt Earp | February 20, 2011

Damn. I guess it’s only her career that died.

Snooki’s Facebook page is flooded with messages from people who think she just died from a massive drug overdose; problem is, it’s not true.

Some people with a morbid sense of humor flooded the Internet this weekend with false reports that the “Jersey Shore” star kicked the bucket. But according to a rep — who spoke to Snooki this morning — she’s alive and probably drinking somewhere right now.

In fairness, someone riddled with that many STD’s has probably built up a tolerance to normal, everyday maladies.

Topics: Evil = Funny | 12 Comments »

12 Responses to “Snooki: Not Dead”

  1. RogerDee Says:
    February 20th, 2011 at 10:10 am

    SKANK!!!

  2. Dannytheman Says:
    February 20th, 2011 at 10:46 am

    Whale shit woman at the bottom of the sea!! Skank isn’t low enough!

  3. Wyatt Earp Says:
    February 20th, 2011 at 11:49 am

    Roger – You beat me to it.

    Danny – But, but, she’s very talented!!!

  4. proof Says:
    February 20th, 2011 at 11:54 am

    Wyatt: you should have run her mug shot to “do her justice”.

  5. Loaded Dice in Vegas Says:
    February 20th, 2011 at 1:59 pm

    So her 15 minutes are over?

  6. Mrs. Crankipants Says:
    February 20th, 2011 at 2:45 pm

    That picture makes her look like a drunk, 70′s-era, discount department store mannequin with cheap acrylic nails.

  7. ed Says:
    February 20th, 2011 at 3:25 pm

    She’s the future of the American woman.

    God help us all.

    I condemn myself for my judgementalism.

  8. Ferrell Gummitt Says:
    February 20th, 2011 at 5:40 pm

    Sorry, I group her with the Kardashians, Lindsay Lohan and Paris Hilton in the “They’re Hot when I’m S***t-Faced Drunk” Category…

  9. Wyatt Earp Says:
    February 20th, 2011 at 8:01 pm

    Proof – Someone should punch her in the mug.

    LDIV – Highly doubtful. Never underestimate the stupidity of MTV viewers.

    Mrs. Crankipants – And luscious, fake cans.

    Ed – If that’s the future, I’m moving to Slovakia.

    Ferrell – Captain America would do her.

  10. Morgan Says:
    February 20th, 2011 at 9:18 pm

    Frankly, I don’t see the appeal for this Snooki, especially when there’s this.

  11. Dr. Evil Says:
    February 21st, 2011 at 8:38 am

    Well…if you want to call that alive. In my world her, Amy Whinehouse, Lohan, and Dick Clark are already dead.

  12. Wyatt Earp Says:
    February 21st, 2011 at 3:25 pm

    Morgan – That’s nice, no doubt about it.

    Dr. Evil – I saw Clark on New Year’s Eve. Wow, just wow.

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