Hate Mail O’ The Week
By Wyatt Earp | March 11, 2010
This week’s hate mail comes to us from the lovely and talented “BPC Student,” who apparently has some real anger issues. As with most of my hate mail, this mental giant commented on this story, which was originally posted on June 26, 2009! Way to stay current. Here is Einstein’s complete e-mail, unedited for your reading pleasure:
look assholes i am not a communist infact i am anti communist also whoever the bitch who wrote the website i can tell you that only 1 person is a communist. out of 150 kids. also the “maruanah” leaf is a maple leaf and the communist symbol is just there as a joke and if u walk by our school i bet you wont find the things in this article that were there. finally catholic schools are were most of the kids are gay
Wow, that private edu-ma-cation is really paying off in spades! BPC said some rather interesting things. Allow me to retort. First of all, there is a new thing called spell check. It comes free with most computers, dontcha know? Secondly, you can count the people who confuse a maple leaf with a marijuana leaf one one hand. Finally, you claim that if you walk by the school you won’t find the things that are listed in the article? Really, genius? Click the above link. I posted the photo from the article, and it clearly shows a Soviet hammer and sickle as well as the slogan, “Capitalism Will Fail.” Check it out – even a Rhodes Scholar like yourself can see both images as plain as day.
According to the original article, the Black Pine Circle School is comprised of students from kindergarten to eighth grade. So the vulgar genius who wrote this grammatical abortion is no older than 14 years old. Nice.
Topics: Hate Mail | 14 Comments »
March 11th, 2010 at 4:45 pm
A real GOOF!
March 11th, 2010 at 4:49 pm
You get the best hate mail EVER. I’m so jealous. I only get shit like your stuck up or I think I’m better than anyone else. I attended catholic school – and an all girls one for high school – does that make me gay? Mmmmm.
March 11th, 2010 at 5:39 pm
I went to Catholic school too! I guess it’s time to break out the flannel shirts, the comfortable shoes, and my Holly Near records.
March 11th, 2010 at 6:44 pm
This kid’s teachers ought to be ashamed of themselves.
March 11th, 2010 at 7:30 pm
I just have to say that my public school students are way smarter and way more articulate.
Didn’t you go to Catholic schools? Just sayin’. ;P””’
March 11th, 2010 at 8:49 pm
Rick – You can say that again.
Robbie – Wow, that imagery is really hot. Sorry, where were we?
Mrs. Crankipants – You and Robbie??? Wow, that’s really, really hot!!!
John D – They certainly dropped the ball with this one.
RT – I did, indeed, and I turned out just . . . oh. Damn.
March 11th, 2010 at 10:06 pm
The Golden Rules of Hate Mail:
1. Find a blog you’ve never visited before in your life, preferably by Googling a topic that was in the news so long ago that no one else remembers it.
2. Find a post that’s at least 3 months old, but the older the better. Timeliness is for attention whores.
3. Use no punctuation. Apostrophes and commas are for pussies. Also, run on sentences and/or fragments show you’re a creative type with no need for rules.
4. Use no spell check. You’re brilliant, you don’t need a dictionary.
5. Alternating between capitalized and lower case letters is distracting from the power of your message. Use either all caps or don’t capitalize a single word.
6. Misuse any of the following words at least once but preferably multiple times:
-there, they’re, and their
-it’s and its
-you’re and your
-where and were
Again, you’re a grammar anarchist. Don’t give in to The
ManRed Pen!7. Insult the post’s author using the most uncreative and juvenile derogatory terms you can think of. You have to stoop to their level! Tell them off in terms that they (and their dog) can understand.
March 11th, 2010 at 11:21 pm
Ignore them, isn’t California going to break off into the sea anyways in 2012? It’s not? Dang.
March 12th, 2010 at 12:48 am
Jon, the Atlantis myth goes to show that merely breaking off into the sea will tend to make you remembered in a fuzzy glow. However, going bankrupt, having everyone move away, and running out of water pretty much gets you onto the ghost town list, and they will do that by 2012. So ignore away — it’s all good.
March 12th, 2010 at 6:47 am
Aw hell. This little piece of crap needs to grow the eff up.
March 12th, 2010 at 7:55 am
Code Monkey – That was the most brilliant comment I have read in a long time. And the new avatar seals the deal.
Jon – Did anyone ever think that the Mayans just stopped at 2012 because they were tired? Or they ran out of papyrus?
Comatus – And Schwarzenegger is making it happen. Good show, Ah-nuld!
GroovyVic – No need, since the state will take care of him/her for life.
March 12th, 2010 at 8:16 am
Wyatt – Or maybe a conquistador put a musket ball thru the scribes head?
March 12th, 2010 at 10:39 am
You should man-up and forward your original blog post and this kids response to school officials.
or you could just continue being gay. I’m just sayin’.
March 12th, 2010 at 11:02 am
Jon – I like your thinking and would like to subscribe to your newsletter.
Randal – Not that there’s anything wrong with that.