The Monkey’s Off Our Back
By Wyatt Earp | February 13, 2009
Last night’s ice hockey game was good. And not just “Wow, I found a quarter!” good, but “Wow, I just found Uma Thurman’s home phone number!” good. Everyone was running on all cylinders, and even I played pretty well. What are the odds? Here are the highlights:
1. The Badger came back after missing the last game with an illness. Randal Graves snarked that Badger was getting a sex-change operation, but those rumors have not been confirmed. Chick or not, he played very well for us in goal, and let only one opposing biscuit go into the basket.
2. Randal Graves was so happy with our performance last night that he opted against calling us “pussies” of “homos” at all. It was a weird feeling. Of course, after he absolutely buried an opposing player into the boards, he was much less stressed.
3. Fish’s first shift was a nightmare. After playing “turnstile” with an opposing winger, he came back to block a slew of shots, and saved a breakaway by kicking the puck from the attacking player. Those soccer skills never truly leave, ya know.
4. Vincent Antonelli had a terrific assist in the first period, but Vinnie’s news has nothing to do with the action on the ice . . .
Badger, Fish, Vinnie, and I always joke about how things change when you get married. Our prime example is the wives’ view of our hockey games. The current prevailing thought is that girlfriends make an effort to come to our hockey games. I know the missus came to a lot of mine when we were dating – she never paid attention to the game, but she showed up. When the girlfriends become wives, the attendance drops dramatically. My wife has averaged maybe one game a season, which is good because my girlfriend usually shows up! Heh.
Any hoo, Vinnie mentioned this theorem to Mrs. Antonelli the other day. They laughed about it and that was the end of it. Until last night. Vinnie walks into the rink and sees a woman standing near the bleachers. He says to himself, “Hey, D had a coat just like that.” On second glance, he sees why – the woman is Mrs. Antonelli.
For the record, Mrs. Antonelli is very attractive and way out of Vinnie’s league. (Sorry Vin, but it’s true.) She also has a terrific sense of humor. She not only came to watch our game, but she also brought her own sign. It read as follows:
Like I said, she has a terrific sense of humor.
We ended up winning the game by a score of 5-1, and our record is now 8-5-3. Our next game is scheduled for next Thursday at 10:30pm.
Topics: Ice Hockey | 8 Comments »
February 13th, 2009 at 4:28 pm
That was very cool of Mrs. Antonelli.
Yay, on the win, too!
February 13th, 2009 at 5:18 pm
Congrats on the win!
February 13th, 2009 at 7:19 pm
Congrats.
Are you gonna quit whining about playing like a bunch of girls now?
runz and hides
February 13th, 2009 at 7:56 pm
Congrats on winning the game!!!
February 13th, 2009 at 9:35 pm
Well done guys!
February 13th, 2009 at 10:03 pm
That is one ugly monkey too. Winning is everything.
February 14th, 2009 at 10:53 am
Congrats!
A couple of British quotes about sport:
“Serious sport is war minus the shooting.”(George Orwell)
(except for ice hockey, of course!)
“Some people think football is a matter of life and death…I can assure them it is much more serious than that.” (Bill Shankly)
William “Bill” Shankly, OBE (2 September 1913 – 29 September 1981) was one of Britain’s most successful and respected football managers. Shankly was also a fine player, whose career was interrupted by the Second World War. He played nearly 300 times in The Football League for Preston North End and represented Scotland seven times.
He is most remembered, however, for his achievements as a manager, particularly with Liverpool. Shankly established Liverpool, which had been a Second Division club when he arrived, as one of the major forces in the English game. The club won three league championships, two FA Cups and the UEFA Cup under Shankly,
February 15th, 2009 at 7:53 am
RT – Yeah, the sign was a riot.
Snigs – Thanks. It was a good night.
E.L. – I’m not whiiinnniiinnnggg!
JeffT – Thanks. It was a good effort by all involved.
Old NFO/Admiral – Thanks!
Alan B – The Shankly quote is fantastic!