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Philly Thief Is Going To Hell

By Wyatt Earp | September 14, 2010

It has not been a good week for the Catholic Church in Philadelphia. First, the city threatened a Manayunk church with daily $700 fines for their “offensive” bells. Then, a 19th Century church in Spring Garden – home to two of Philadelphia’s Saints – was slated for destruction. Now, a Rhawnhurst church is reporting a theft of $11,000 in Sunday church collections.

And from the looks of it, it may be an inside job.

Not for nothing, but if you steal from a church, you should expect to spend a lot of time in Hell hobnobbing with Hitler, Stalin, and the Marx Brothers. I’m just sayin’.

More than $11,000 in collections was stolen a church in the Rhawnhurst section of Philadelphia Sunday. A thief broke into the basement office of the Resurrection of Our Lord church sometime after services Sunday and stole thousands of dollars worth of collections from the church safe.

Philadelphia Police Lt. Mark Burgmann said that there was no sign of forced entry. He has a theory that the thief hid inside the church until after it closed Sunday. There was no damage to any part of the building or the safe, which suggests someone had the combination, say police. Police are interviewing all church employees.

You know, a lot of people have issues with the Catholic Church, especially in Philadelphia. Lord knows some of those issues have been self-inflicted, but this is just despicable. Among other things, that money goes to paying bills – water, heat, electric – for the church and the school. This scumbag is screwing a lot of people, including children. I hope he’s proud of himself.

Topics: Philly, WTF? | 15 Comments »

15 Responses to “Philly Thief Is Going To Hell”

  1. AJ Lynch Says:
    September 14th, 2010 at 1:04 pm

    My old parish. “Resso” grad class of 1966.

  2. CaptainAmerica Says:
    September 14th, 2010 at 2:39 pm

    Good thing it wasn’t a Mosque or they’d be marching in the streets chanting “death to the infidels”!

  3. richard mcenroe Says:
    September 14th, 2010 at 3:25 pm

    Hmmm… Paramount Marx Bros or MGM Marx Bros?

  4. Randal Graves Says:
    September 14th, 2010 at 3:36 pm

    So, how much are you Catholics donating to this church to help them recover their funds?

  5. centaur Says:
    September 14th, 2010 at 3:39 pm

    Right, Captain America. It’d also be a “top of the fold” headline, first up on the evening news. I mean across the country.

  6. JeffT Says:
    September 14th, 2010 at 4:09 pm

    I attended Resurrection of Our Lord, 1st grade through 4th grade. Then we moved! Now that was a very long time ago. Evidently the neighborhood has not improved since I left.

  7. Jim Says:
    September 14th, 2010 at 4:58 pm

    Reso is my wife’s home parish as well. She moved out when she married me — 22 years ago. My in-laws are still there – and putting their envelope in the collection basket every week. Yeah, the neighborhood has changed a bit, but not so much that I’d think they’d be stealing from the churches.

  8. bob (either orr) Says:
    September 14th, 2010 at 7:00 pm

    Not Groucho, Harpo, Chico, Gummo and Zeppo… he’s thinking Karl and his clan of brothers from different mothers (Lenin, Mao, Stalin, Pol Pot, Obama, etc.)

  9. AJ Lynch Says:
    September 14th, 2010 at 7:21 pm

    In 1958, I was in 1st grade there and the two 1st grade classes each had 100 kids in it. No lie!

    By 8th grade, they had built an annex and there were three classes for each grade. My 8th grade class had 66 kids in it. No lie!

    And no tuition back then either.

  10. AJ Lynch Says:
    September 14th, 2010 at 7:26 pm

    And it was a great school!

  11. Wyatt Earp Says:
    September 14th, 2010 at 10:11 pm

    AJ – Lots of Mayfair folks around these parts.

    Captain – A few packs of bacon will thin their numbers a little.

    Richard – MGM, of course!

    Randal – How much are you? You’re Catholic. Or have you forgotten after being in the sticks for so long.

    Centaur – Again, easily settled with pork catapults.

    JeffT – The 15th District is one of the busiest districts in the city now.

    Jim – I wonder if it was a parishioner?

    Bob – No, I meant Groucho, et al. Hate those guys.

    AJ – Ah, the good old days of Catholic school in Philly. Gone forever, sadly.

  12. AJ Lynch Says:
    September 14th, 2010 at 10:16 pm

    Going to Mayfair with its Pennypack Park and big grounds of Lincold H.S. seemed like the suburbs to us in Rhawnhurst. I used to go to the the Mayfair and The Merben movie theaters. [Christ I sound like a fossil].

  13. Bob G. Says:
    September 15th, 2010 at 9:51 am

    If there was one thing I brought to the churches I attended in Philly, it was that before the last person leaves, you “sweep” the place…EVERY nook and cranny.
    Check the windows, double check the exits , and then you can close up shop…NOT before.
    Seems the stewards need to start thinking like the criminals that are preying on them.
    Just a thought.

    Stay safe out there.

    BTW, AJ Lynch…we must be “fellow fossils”…been there, done all that…lol
    (the stories I could tell)


  14. Wyatt Earp Says:
    September 15th, 2010 at 12:01 pm

    AJ – And the Devon?

    Bob G. – Then again, who thinks someone would be despicable enough to steal from a place of worship?

  15. AJ Lynch Says:
    September 15th, 2010 at 5:02 pm

    Heh this is a family blog so I can’t answer that.