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Stinging In The Rain

By Wyatt Earp | May 4, 2010

So, let me tell you about Sunday. It was brutally hot outside, so we turned on the newly-installed central air. (We landed it during last summer’s construction.) It worked like a dream and we were sitting pretty. Then it happened. I was downstairs writing posts when Kyle came up and said, “Dad, Mom needs you. There’s a leak in your bedroom.” I figured he was kidding, since it wasn’t raining, but I went upstairs anyway.

I walked into the room to see the missus rushing around with towels. I also noticed the waterfall coming through the ceiling. The missus said, “Get some buckets!” Lovely. Apparently, the central air unit sprung a leak and our new bedroom was feeling the brunt of it. We called the contractor and he sent the air conditioning guy on Monday morning. The diagnosis? A split in the pan. Apparently it was a factory defect, but that is little comfort with the inside rain. After apologizing up and down, the guy ordered a new pan, and it “should” be here this morning.

After hearing my tale of woe, Jim sent me this story to calm my frazzled nerves. He is a good man.

Christina Hendricks, SYLG’s favorite babe, recently dispensed some advice to the men out there. I’m not a real man, but if I were, I would be paying attention to this. Christina told the following to that bastion of manliness Ryan Seacrest. Apparently, he is the voice for all men now.

Here are a few of Christina’s bullet points:

We love your body. If we’re in love with you, we love your body. Your potbelly, everything.

I sincerely doubt that.

Speaking of your body, you don’t understand the power of your own smell. Any woman who is currently with a man is with him partly because she loves the way he smells.

I sincerely doubt that, too. On a good day, I smell like cheese and shame.

We remember forever what you say about the bodies of other women. When you mention in passing that a certain woman is attractive — your comment goes into a steel box and it stays there forever. We also remember everything you say about our bodies, be it good or bad. Doesn’t matter if it’s a compliment.

Okay, that’s something I didn’t realize, so I better adjust my internal edit. The last point, though, struck me like a punch in the face:

The men who constantly stare at our breasts are never the men we’re attracted to.

Dammit! That’s my only move!

Topics: Babes | 17 Comments »

17 Responses to “Stinging In The Rain”

  1. RogerDee Says:
    May 4th, 2010 at 7:13 am

    The last comment trims the list of potential suitors, especially with this smashing young lady. She needs to be “posted”every other day.

  2. Wyatt Earp Says:
    May 4th, 2010 at 8:05 am

    RogerDee – Yeah, the chest is impressive, but I think she’s gorgeous either way.

  3. piperfromtn Says:
    May 4th, 2010 at 8:40 am

    We’ve had the same thing happen, only our pan was downstaiirs but leaky, nonetheless.
    I hope yours pans out for you.

  4. AJ Lynch Says:
    May 4th, 2010 at 9:14 am

    Don’t taze me bro! Gotta post about this one Wyatt.

  5. John D Says:
    May 4th, 2010 at 9:16 am

    I feel your pain re: the AC. We had to replace our condenser last year. Not cheap. But still worth it on the hot days.

  6. Wyatt Earp Says:
    May 4th, 2010 at 9:19 am

    Piper – We should know in a few hours. Haven’t slept well in two days.

    AJ – Not happening. National news is already crucifying the officers. I’m not adding to that.

    John D – It’s gonna be covered because it’s a factory defect, but the leak damage is troubling.

  7. Robbie Says:
    May 4th, 2010 at 9:45 am

    Oh stare away – the older I get the more flattered I become at a guy salivating while looking at one of my body parts, and if you wanna tell me “nice ass – or great rack” go right ahead….all lude compliments accepting over here.

  8. Wyatt Earp Says:
    May 4th, 2010 at 9:49 am

    Robbie – I’ve seen pictures of you. You’re pretty damned yummy!

  9. Robbie Says:
    May 4th, 2010 at 10:07 am

    (*blushing*) TY

  10. Wyatt Earp Says:
    May 4th, 2010 at 10:12 am

    Robbie – Oh, you’re welcome, dear. Although a compliment from a guy with troll-like features shouldn’t make you blush. Heh.

  11. Jon Brooks Says:
    May 4th, 2010 at 12:52 pm

    I’ve alwyas liked…all body parts.

  12. AJ Lynch Says:
    May 4th, 2010 at 2:51 pm


    When I watched the video, I thought it was a very plump female officer. He needs some slimfast.

  13. BillN Says:
    May 4th, 2010 at 6:42 pm

    Wyatt I feel your pain. I also had new central air installed late last fall. I fell asleep in front of the Phils game at a blissfull 72 degrees last evening, woke up @ 11:30 it was a sweaty 78.

    They can’t come look at it til Friday. I sugest we enter into a pact like in “Throw Momma from the Train” if we don’t get satisfaction. No one who has ever delt with a contractor would convict us.

    Also should I die I want to come back as Ms. Hendricks’ full lenght bedroom mirror.

  14. Mrs. Crankipants Says:
    May 5th, 2010 at 7:07 am

    I’d come back as her bra.

  15. Wyatt Earp Says:
    May 5th, 2010 at 9:37 am

    Jon – Especially if they belong to an angel like Christina.

    BillN – Done! They fixed it yesterday afternoon, and it was working like a charm last night. So far, no signs of leaks. (Knocks on wood.)

    Mrs. Crankipants – You’d certainly have a big fan club and a lot of media exposure.

  16. I.B. Wright Says:
    May 6th, 2010 at 11:06 am

    Some women do everything possible to get you to look at their knockers……and now she tells us that women won’t go for a guy who looks at them.

    What this shows is that she is ashamed of hers and she doesn’t want anyone looking at them.

  17. Wyatt Earp Says:
    May 6th, 2010 at 11:56 am

    I.B. – I volunteer to take one for the team and stare at them anyway.