Recent Posts

Recent Comments


Cop Land

« | Main | »

Philly Police Investigate Serial Groper

By Wyatt Earp | October 27, 2009

Lucky CharmsLook, I like Lucky Charms just as much as the next guy, but this is ridiculous! Although I always wondered why Lucky the Leprechaun had such a big smile on his face . . .

What’s that? It’s a serial groper, not a cereal groper? Oh, I get it. Well then, I guess this is much, much worse.

Philadelphia Police are investigating a pattern of sexual assaults in Germantown, with the latest reported Tuesday morning.

Police said a 16-year-old female was approached by man in the 7400 block of Germantown Avenue at about 8 a.m. The male appeared to be jogging and indecently assaulted the teen as he ran past.

The suspect’s description was similar to seven similar assaults in the area as far back as June 2008. In all of the previous incidents, the suspect groped female teenagers as he jogged past them.

The subject has been described as a black male, about 40 to 50 years old, over 6′ tall, dark complexion and medium build, sometimes with a beard and wearing jogging clothing. (H/TCBS3)

This perv must think that female joggers are “magically delicious.” What? I’m just sayin’.

Topics: Philly, The Job | 5 Comments »

5 Responses to “Philly Police Investigate Serial Groper”

  1. Smite A. Hippie Says:
    October 27th, 2009 at 9:18 pm

    maybe he thinks he’s going to get “lucky” ?

    *rim shot*

  2. USAdmiral Says:
    October 27th, 2009 at 11:11 pm

    This makes me think of “Coco for Coco puffs”?

    I think this closes the “every assault possible” and on record file.

  3. WALTERC Says:
    October 28th, 2009 at 6:24 pm

    The groper description sounds like Danny Glover in the Lethal Weapon movies.

    Not saying Glover is a sexual predator, just his character came to mind when I read the description.

    Besides, isn’t he in Venezuela?

  4. BadIdeaGuy Says:
    October 29th, 2009 at 6:51 am

    Maybe he thought they were cheeri-hos?

  5. Randal Graves Says:
    October 29th, 2009 at 12:58 pm

    I thought that this would be fitting for this post: