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Archive for September, 2006

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People I Hate

Friday, September 22nd, 2006

This week’s edition is a no-brainer. The United States Government Glenn Beck mentioned this yesterday, but I don’t think he went far enough. This week, the United Nations hosted the most wretched group of scum and villainy this side of Mos Eisley. Both Mahmoud Ahmadinejad and Hugo Chavez were in New York City, and both [...]

Sleep Comes Down

Thursday, September 21st, 2006

The last day and a half was an exhausting nightmare. After a fairly blissful day off, we picked up Kyle from school, came home, and rushed right out to soccer practice. There, his team scrimmaged another squad, and after scoring a goal and almost assisting on another, Kyle’s team won 2-1. Unfortunately, I had little [...]

Will Skate For Food

Wednesday, September 20th, 2006

Well, we had our first team practice at the Skate Zone on Sunday night. It was a great turnout, with everyone on the roster playing except “Crash” – er, Fish. We had ice time for ninety minutes, and split our team in half (eight players a side) for a scrimmage. Vinnie, Badger, and I were [...]

1,000th Post

Tuesday, September 19th, 2006

Well, after everyone’s post ideas have been given careful consideration, I have finally made my decision. I will compromise. What, you thought I could actually make a decision? Silly humans. Top Ten Reasons The U.S. Is The Best Country Ever 10. Country music star Sara Evans.9. Nikki Cox.8. Pitcher Jennie Finch.7. Jessica Simpson.6. NFL Cheerleaders.5. [...]

Me And Toad’s Wild Ride

Monday, September 18th, 2006

An actual phone conversation I received at the detective division today: Me: “Hello, may I help you?”Toad: “Yeah, I wanna know how to press charges.” Me: “Okay. What kind of incident were you involved in?” (Poor grammar, I know.)Toad: “I was in a fight with some dyke.” Me: “Um, okay. What exactly happened?”Toad: “This lesbo [...]

Power To The Papal

Sunday, September 17th, 2006

Muslims around the world have been offended by remarks made recently by Pope Benedict XVI. The Pope quoted a 14th-century text, which characterized Muhammad’s teachings as “evil and inhuman.” Big deal. Muslims are offended by anything and everything. Hell, they started murderous riots over a friggin’ cartoon! Immediately, Middle Eastern Muslims acted to disprove the [...]

"Fighting" Embarrassment

Saturday, September 16th, 2006

Hey, does anyone know how the Michigan-Notre Dame game turned out? WHOO HOO!!! WHOO HOO!!! YES, YES, YES!!! IN YOUR FACE, YOU DRUNKEN LEPRECHAUNS!!! Michigan 47, Notre Dame 21.

"Bribe" Is An Ugly Word

Saturday, September 16th, 2006

I prefer “friendly gift.” Since it is almost hockey season (see below post) and I really want new uniforms, I figured I’d butter Vinnie up with a picture of his favorite hockey player, Sweden’s Emma Laaksonen. Get me a new jersey, and there’s more where that came from, Vin!

Ice To See You

Saturday, September 16th, 2006

Fish – pre-accident – after a game last season. Vinnie Antonelli sent out an e-mail a few weeks ago reminding us that ice hockey season was just around the corner. And yes, despite our ever-advancing age – and my ever-advancing weight – we signed up for the Flyers Skate Zone men’s league. Last season was [...]

Bush Whacked

Friday, September 15th, 2006

By now you must have heard that some jerkass producer has created film that depicts the assassination of President Bush. The film is creating its own little swirl of controversy, but realistically, who is going to pay money to see this? Personally, I wouldn’t, and I can think of at least ten topics more deserving [...]

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