Recent Posts

Recent Comments


Cop Land

« | Main | »

Hey, Hey, Hey . . . Goodbye!

By Wyatt Earp | March 29, 2006

Free at last! Free at last! Thank God Almighty, we’re free at last!

After being held hostage for a week, my neighborhood will be set free today with the much anticipated departure of Extreme Makeover: Home Edition. Today is the new home’s unveiling, and by tomorrow, my neighbors and I will be able to return to our quiet lives.

But that’s tomorrow. Today, the missus had to park her car in the street, because the hundreds of slack-jawed yokels who are attending today’s unveiling are taking up all of our parking spaces – and we’re two blocks away! Don’t you people have jobs???

Here are a few final thoughts for Ty and his cavalcade of a-holes:

  • The new home, while impressive, looks ridiculous. It is a mammoth two-story dwelling set in an exclusively two-story, split level home neighborhood. This thing sticks out like a sore thumb.
  • When you see the show and Ty says how hard he worked, you can yell to the TV that he’s full of crap. Earlier this week, while the others were busting their humps, Ty was on Good Morning America . . . in the studio in New York City.
  • Ty and the local news media have been leaking all of the expensive gadgets that will be in the new mansion. I hope EM:HE is installing a security system, since I’m sure some dirtball will try and burglarize the home in the first week. Not only does the home stick out, but the local media have been broadcasting the street address!
  • Finally, to the gawkers that have made our lives miserable for the past seven days: get a life! Thank you.

Topics: Uncategorized | 7 Comments »

7 Responses to “Hey, Hey, Hey . . . Goodbye!”

  1. Deathlok Says:
    March 29th, 2006 at 2:32 pm

    You feel that way now? Wait until they reaccess your taxes, now that you have a $1M home arounf the corner.

    Yeah, reality television.

  2. Vox Poplar Says:
    March 29th, 2006 at 2:42 pm

    There’s a little tourist town in my area that’s been flooded with ‘come from aways’ mostly from Germany. The CFAs go around building massive ‘cottages’ that they only spend about two weeks a year in, and their neighbours, who live in simple farmhouses get slapped with obese tax bills.

    It’ll probably happen to you to.

  3. The Conservative UAW Guy Says:
    March 29th, 2006 at 4:19 pm

    Glad the saga is ending…

  4. rightwingprof Says:
    March 29th, 2006 at 5:50 pm

    I never could stand that SOB. Btw, in the mail today. You should get them by the end of the week.

  5. Ssssteve Says:
    March 29th, 2006 at 7:03 pm

    That would just go all over me!! I might have to take out that fag designer that they have!! And deathlok is right. They will probably raise your taxes!! Buttholes!! maybe, ty and his gay friends can help pay!!

  6. MJ06 Says:
    March 29th, 2006 at 11:06 pm

    Yeah I agree they give the cast members of that show way to much credit.

    Also you right its the same deal in all those neighbor hoods you have ranches or like you said split level homes and they go in and build an a million dollar home in a neighbor hood families who live in those homes go broke from the property taxes and every one like ssssteve says has to suffer thats to bad.

  7. Wyatt Earp Says:
    March 30th, 2006 at 1:48 am

    Deathlok – And don’t think that scumbag mayor of mine won’t do it.

    Vox – Swell. Can’t wait.

    CUG – Yeah, me too. Today someone tried to block our driveway with their car so they could walk the two blocks to see the show. Thankfully, the missus let her have it, and she meekly drove off.

    Prof – Coolness! I’ll look for it.

    Sssteve – Hell, Ty was barely here! I’m sure he doesn’t care a whit about the residents whose lives he disrupted for over a week.

    MJ06 – Agreed. If that happens, I’ll be praying for a flash flood, locusts, or some other Act of God to take out the home.