An Inconvenient Grope?
By Wyatt Earp | June 24, 2010
Al Gore made the news this week, and not in a good way. A Portland massage therapist claimed that the former vice-president groped and fondled her during a hotel room massage session. Well, it’s good to know that Gore learned a thing or two about “poonhoundery” from former President Clinton.
According to the alleged victim, there is global warming in Al Gore’s pants.
A Portland massage therapist gave local police a detailed statement last year alleging that former Vice President Al Gore groped her, kissed her and made unwanted sexual advances during a late-night massage session in October 2006 in a suite at the upscale Hotel Lucia.
The woman told investigators that she informed two friends and kept the clothes she wore that night, including her black pants with stains on them. But Portland police didn’t contact any of the woman’s friends, obtain the potential evidence or interview anyone at the hotel, records show.
You can read the rest of the juicy details at the link. While the woman’s story may be bunk, there are two interesting things of note. First, no civil suit has been filed – at least not yet – so the gold-digger angle may not wash. Secondly, and maybe more importantly, Al and Tipper Gore recently separated.
One has to wonder if this story contributed to that.
Topics: Snarkasm | 16 Comments »
June 24th, 2010 at 2:37 pm
“Poonhoundery”
That’s funny right there…
June 24th, 2010 at 2:50 pm
It is my understanding he signed into the hotel as “Mr. Stone”. Apparently, she has also signed a 1 million dollar contract with the National Enquirer.
Of course the guy is a total jerk anyway but my guess is this tale is 75% fact at least. Just an opinion of course, but am sure more info will unfold over the next 3 to 6 mos.
June 24th, 2010 at 3:30 pm
Thirdly, Fat Albert is a greasy slimeball bastard.
June 24th, 2010 at 3:37 pm
Sounds like Al wants to blow more than smoke up her skirt! Someone needs to talk about good touches, bad touches and include a pic of “Uncle Al” under the bad column.
June 24th, 2010 at 3:42 pm
No happy ending for the Goracle?
/or was that an Inconvenient
Truth$40 extra?June 24th, 2010 at 3:45 pm
Global warming has probably fried his brain and common
sense similar to those inbred families at the desert gas stops in your typical grade B horror movies. But I’m just trying to be nice.
June 24th, 2010 at 5:10 pm
I heard two good ones today. Al Gore may have said:
“have sex with me or I shoot the polar bear” and “would you like to touch my Oscar?”.
June 24th, 2010 at 5:15 pm
Disgusting fat bast Al Gore makes mermaids break into applause when they realize they don’t have a cunny.
June 24th, 2010 at 5:53 pm
..and one has to wonder if he had become President in 2000, where would be now? Or would we have had The President and the Interns Part II?
June 24th, 2010 at 6:36 pm
I read the entire reported account elsewhere….so gross (if it is true).
Who knew under all that uptight db-ness…
June 24th, 2010 at 6:53 pm
Remember the BLUE DRESS? Now reports are there is a pair of BLACK SLACKS. Way gross. He’s a total creeper.
LOL
June 24th, 2010 at 10:17 pm
GroovyVic – Stole it from Archer (on FX). Funniest show on TV.
Ralph – Gore is a weasel, and politicians love the hot ace, so who knows?
Watuschskie – Don’t hold back. Tell us what you really think!
MeToo – Heh, heh, “blow.”
Fenway – Apparently, he only carries carbon credits.
Jon – Al has slightly better teeth.
AJ – *shudder*
Mrs. Crankipants – Thread Winner!!!
Ferrell – I guess Al had to settle with Bill’s castoffs.
RT – Uptight douchebags are the biggest poon offenders of all. (See also: Eliot Spitzer)
Captain – BLACK SLACKS? Racist!!!
June 25th, 2010 at 8:35 am
Is that a hockey stick in your pocket, Al, or are you glad to see me?
Apologies to Mae West.
June 25th, 2010 at 8:51 am
Cbullitt – It’s some petrified carbon.
June 25th, 2010 at 11:35 pm
I was going to jump on this Like Clinton on an intern, but I did some poking and prodding (of the story, Wyatt) and a lot of it stinks. The so-called victim started to negotiate terms for her story so much the Portland press walked away and dropped the whole thing. I think, for once, the liberal press called this one right when they buried it.
June 26th, 2010 at 9:30 am
B.A. – Quite possibly, but I would put nothing past Gore.