Guns: Is There Anything They Can’t Do?
By Wyatt Earp | January 19, 2010
There are a lot of people in this country – I like to call them dirty filthy hippies – who excoriate firearms and the owners of firearms. Most of these people – dirty filthy hippies – think this way because they have never been a victim.
Of course, you don’t always have to be a victim of a crime to be thankful for your firearm. You can also be a victim of nature. Luckily, this man was well-prepared.
ROSEVILLE, Calif. – A driver whose SUV plunged into a Northern California creek after he was startled by his hands-free cell phone device escaped the sinking vehicle by blasting out the window with a handgun. The 28-year-old man, whose name wasn’t immediately available, is an armed security guard at Thunder Valley Casino, north of Sacramento. He sustained minor injuries in Sunday’s accident.
A spokesman for the Roseville Fire Department said the man was traveling northbound on Industrial Avenue in Roseville when the cell phone device activated. The driver was startled and veered off the road through the guardrail. The SUV landed in Pleasant Grove Creek.
Of course, if this man watched Man Vs. Wild or Survivorman, he would know that the trick is to roll down the windows, wait for the car to fill up with water – which equalizes the compartment pressure – and open the door to safety.
Shooting out the windows is a lot more fun, though.
Topics: Gun Pr0n | 11 Comments »
The question is:
What kind of fag gets startled by a cell phone so bad that he crashes his car through a guardrail?
He probably sharted himself too.
I believe when you plunge into a creek and the water is rushing in, disciplined procedures go out the window, er, so to speak.
Besides being fun, it is immediately effective. Of course, given the panicky response one wonders if he was texting at the time.
If that fool was “startled” by his cell phone, he better never get involved in a shootout!
Some of our staunchest conservatives today are the liberal moonbatz who just got mugged or raped last night.
I have spoken my words of wisdom for today.
From my days of woodchuck shootin’ from the car (as an idiot youth), from the dirt access road, since the farmer wouldn’t let us on his land in Andover OH/Pa., he will also be very very deaf for a few hours or days.
Randal – Maybe he had the “Chicken Pot Pie” ringtone?
Ralph – Hey, maybe he wanted to increase the suspense?
Watuschskie – Yeah, the shootout would be a failure if he wets his pants at the sounds of gunfire.
Jon – Looks like he’ll need a Miracle Ear.
I shoot a .45 in IDPA and it’s loud, even with Pro-Ears hearing protection!
[...] Apparently they can also double as a vehicular rescue tool. [...]
Having been close to a firearm (not by choice) when the gun was fired I remember a ringing sensation that lasted for a little over a day.
I can imagine zippy the egress master had the same thing.
By ‘startled’, I think they mean ‘woken up.’
You’re right about rolling down the windows, but electric windows may fail underwater. I would have tried using my .45 to break the window by hitting it instead of shooting, but I suppose that might not work.
Piper – Yeah, it’ll wake you up.
Jason – But think of the embellished war stories he can tell now.
Anon – Serves him right for having a three martini lunch. Heh.
Scott – Yeah, didn’t think about the electricity, but then again, I’m a moron.