Archive for April, 2009
« Previous Entries Next Entries »The EXACTO: Gun Pr0n Extraordinaire
Thursday, April 16th, 2009Oooh, baby! I want one! *drools* The three Navy SEAL snipers who killed the pirates off the coast of Somalia last weekend were lucky the buccaneers were gullible enough to allow their lifeboat to be towed farther out to sea by the U.S.S. Bainbridge. The shortened towline turned what could have been a trio of [...]
Will Ferrell Survives Outing With Bear Grylls
Thursday, April 16th, 2009I wonder if he drank his own urine or dined on moose testicles? LOS ANGELES – Will Ferrell says it was a thrill to join adventurer Bear Grylls for an icy episode of Discovery Channel’s “Man vs. Wild.” The channel said Wednesday that Ferrell and series host Grylls spent two days in Sweden’s mountains and [...]
Jennifer Love Hewitt Loves Funny Geeks
Thursday, April 16th, 2009Sure she does. I’ll bet she eats ice cream all the time and thinks she’s not all that attractive, too. Personally, I doubt she’s trolling blogs looking for her newest love interest. The ‘Ghost Whisperer’ is whispering secrets to Maxim again. Jennifer Love Hewitt becomes one of the few stars to grace the magazine’s cover [...]
Money In Bra Saves Woman’s Life
Thursday, April 16th, 2009And you thought women stopped stuffing their bras when they left middle school. RIO DE JANEIRO – Money stuffed in a woman’s bra saved her life after she was shot aboard a bus in the northeastern Brazilian state of Bahia, local media reported. The incident took place Saturday in Bahia’s capital, Salvador, where 58-year-old Ivonete [...]
Humpday History Highlight
Wednesday, April 15th, 2009Today was a busy day in history. Despite the fact that we’re being fisted by the IRS, the Titanic sank today (1912), Jackie Robinson broke baseball’s color barrier today (1947), and Congress ratified peace with Great Britain (1783). I decided to go with President Lincoln’s death. April 15, 1865 – President Lincoln Dies At 7:22 [...]
Shaq Gets Punked With Peanuts
Wednesday, April 15th, 2009Code Monkey sent me this. I liked it, and I think you will, too. Phoenix Suns forward Lou Amundson has been on the wrong end of pranks all season long, the majority coming from none other than Shaquille O’Neal. After the Suns final practice of the season Amundson was finally able to be on the [...]
Pirates Attack Another American Ship
Wednesday, April 15th, 2009Wow, these guys have some wontons on them, don’t they? No brains, but enough wontons to fill Chairman Moe’s Magic Wok. Of course, no brains are not a good match for the unlimited firepower of the U.S. armed forces. In my opinion, not only should we fire at these bastards on sight, but President Obama [...]
Actress Blake Lively Is Insane
Wednesday, April 15th, 2009This attractive woman told an interviewer that she feels “like a tranny a lot of the time.” Eh, what? “Gossip Girl” star Blake Lively is one of television’s most beautiful actresses, but that doesn’t mean she doesn’t have her own share of insecurities. In an interview in the May issue of Allure magazine, on sale [...]
500,000!
Wednesday, April 15th, 2009And all this time my family told me I’d never amount to anything. Four years ago, if someone would have told me that this insignificant little blog would earn half a million hits, I would call that person a filthy, stinking liar. Then I would punch said person in the groin. And then I’d laugh. [...]
Prince William Is No “Iceman”
Tuesday, April 14th, 2009Well, unless there is a part of Top Gun where Maverick and Iceman went from shutdown to afterburner. Who knows? Maybe they left that scene on the cutting room floor along with the gratuitous Kelly McGillis nudity. Of course, since William is royalty, I am sure we will soon here cries of “Nothing to see [...]
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