Archive for March, 2009
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Friday, March 27th, 2009Flash Bang Caption Contest (Source: Break.com) Submit your original caption to this photo in the comments section, or e-mail me your photoshop entries. The winners will be announced on Monday, March 30th. Good luck! Other Current Contests: Blonde Sagacity Family Security Matters Gone Rick Motel Right Pundits Rodney Dill RT Top Ten Entries (And Not [...]
Brazilian Prez Blames Whitey For Economy
Friday, March 27th, 2009Apparently, Luiz Inácio Lula da Silva only blames the “white part” of President Obama for the economic downturn. Brazil’s President Luiz Inácio Lula da Silva on Thursday blamed the global economic crisis on “white people with blue eyes” and said it was wrong that black and indigenous people should pay for white people’s mistakes. Does [...]
Wanted U.S. Marshal’s Body Found In Mexico
Friday, March 27th, 2009Normally, I would say that this was a sad story. It is never a good day when a law enforcement officer is murdered. Of course, since this particular U.S. marshal was charged with stealing government property – including weapons – and his body was found in Juarez, Mexico, it is a safe bet to say [...]
Carmen Electra: Swimsuit Babe
Friday, March 27th, 2009All this time I thought she was just a bad actress. Heh. Ashley Paige is the most popular swimsuit designer in Hollywood, with a client list that runs the gamut from Jessica Simpson to Jennifer Aniston. But Ashley’s suits have never looked hotter than they did earlier this week. Carmen Electra just completed a photo [...]
Obama Opposes Legalizing Marijuana
Friday, March 27th, 2009Did you hear that? That was Obama’s kook hippie base jumping off the bandwagon. WASHINGTON – President Barack Obama had some fun with at least one question at his online town hall, saying he doesn’t think legalizing marijuana is a good strategy for turning around the economy. Obama told the audience Thursday that one of [...]
True Detective Stories
Thursday, March 26th, 2009God bless the stupid people of Philadelphia. For without them, I would currently be unemployed. The following is an actual phone conversation I had with a toad yesterday afternoon. Trust me when I tell you this is completely true, because I am not talented enough to make up comedy this rich. Wyatt: “Good afternoon, Detective [...]
Dems Reject GOP Call For Reduced Spending
Thursday, March 26th, 2009I mean, what’s the difference to the Democrats, anyway? Obama’s proposal for next year includes $3.7 trillion of spending. That’s trillion with a “T.” And to think, people crucified President Bush – and rightly so – for spending $700 billion on a bailout. WASHINGTON – Democrats on the Senate Budget Committee defeated a Republican attempt [...]
British Names Less Cocksure Than Before
Thursday, March 26th, 2009The future residence of Bill and Hillary Clinton. LONDON – The number of people in Britain with surnames like Cockshott, Balls, Death and Shufflebottom — likely the source of schoolroom laughter — has declined by up to 75 percent in the last century. Heh, heh, “Cockshott.” Oh come on, you’re giggling, too! A study found [...]
Valerie Bertinelli: Bikini-Clad At 48
Thursday, March 26th, 2009Wow, it’s like all of the 40-somethings got together and decided to shed their clothes in public. As a red-blooded American male, all I can say is, “Thank you, thank you, thank you!” Lately, it seems like all the media does is scrutinize the weight of Hollywood stars — females in particular. If Jessica Simpson [...]
Sean Penn Is A Stooge
Thursday, March 26th, 2009Wow, that is easily the most obvious headline ever written here. For some unknown (insane) reason, the Farrelly Brothers are in discussions to make a Three Stooges film. For an even more unknown (and more insane) reason, they want Sean Frakkin’ Penn to play Philadelphia’s own Larry Fine. This story will anger a lot of [...]
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