Tinkling On Our Parade
By Wyatt Earp | October 10, 2008
Remember this the next time you think Philadelphia police officers and detectives have it so good. Unfortunately, this is a true story.
So, while working in the division today, we were notified that the city, in its infinite wisdom, will be doing work on our decrepit, 38-year old building. More specifically, they will be removing our water pipes and installing brand new ones. The task is supposed to take the entire day. So, what’s the problem?
We won’t have water – and, more importantly – we won’t be able to use the toilets at all. For the entire day!
Wait, it gets better. The city – again, in its infinite wisdom – made arrangements for the PRISONERS to be relocated to a different division. We can’t have them inconvenienced, right? The detectives and police officers in the building? Not so much. The patrol officers can stop somewhere to relieve themselves, but for those of us who spend eight hours in the building, I guess we have to get creative.
Personally, I am going to tinkle out the second-story window, and poop in one of the small trashcans. Okay, I’m kidding (or am I?) but you get the point. The Philadelphia Police Department treats its employees as numbers, and they care more about the criminals than the people who protect the city from them.
We do have a handful (actually, two) detective vehicles assigned to us, so yes, we could conceivably drive somewhere with a working rest room, but if we’re busy, we won’t get the chance. I realize that the work needs to be done, and that we never close, but there must be a better option. Why they can’t do the work during the overnight shift – when less officers, and citizens – are in the building is beyond me.
Everyone needs a drink or two during an eight-hour day. I usually have two Turkey Hill Diet Iced Teas and two bottles of water, so I should be hopping around on one foot be 3pm. If nothing else, it sure will be entertaining.
This will probably be the scene tomorrow when I get home from work:
Topics: The Job | 7 Comments »
October 10th, 2008 at 9:58 pm
What, they can’t afford to rent a few porta-potties for you guys? Frickin’ cheapskates. What does your union have to say about all this?
October 10th, 2008 at 10:55 pm
John D – Our union is one of the worst in the country. They supported John Street’s re-election campaign because (their words) “He hasn’t hurt us yet.” Are you kidding me???
October 11th, 2008 at 2:47 am
I feel for ya. Hope it doesn’t last long- for the last 3 months we’ve had our water turned off at random times for hours on end. They never give advance notice to us, and are not obligated to provide bottled water to the families who live here unless the outage is PLANNED for more than 4 hours (since they don’t announce or plan them evidently they can avoid supplying water at all). No bathrooms, no water to wash with, huge open stinking trenches up and down our road, mud, fences blocking sidewalks (gee, it’s fun pushing baby strollers in the street, and more fun when there are backhoes driving there). I swear if anyone ever says “Oh it must be so neat to live in Italy!” to me again, I will kick them in the teeth.
October 11th, 2008 at 3:03 am
Tie a knot in it…
October 11th, 2008 at 6:21 am
The doctors can do some more snipping and put a bag on ya.
See, you should become a history teacher. If that happened at a school, they’d close the school.
Do you think they’ll fix your divisions air conditioning? HA! Sorry…actually got a little hopeful for you there for a second.
October 11th, 2008 at 10:00 am
Dorkelina – Yeah, it’s not that bad . . . yet, but it’s not going to be an easy day.
Old NFO – Just for that, I’m driving to your house to do it on your lawn.
RT – The air conditioning works now. I think it started working on the first day of Fall. Bastards.
October 11th, 2008 at 11:58 am
Welcome to my world Wyatt. Be glad it’s only a temporary visit.
I’m self employed, usually work outside… rarely have access to a bathroom on the job… and have Ulcerative Colitis to boot…
I so feel your pain…