David Remes: “Mooning” For Rebuttal

By Wyatt Earp | July 19, 2008

In my fourteen years as a police officer and detective, I have come into contact with a lot of lawyers. In my experience, most of them aren’t worth my time or energy. It doesn’t matter if they are assistant district attorneys or defense attorneys; most – but not all – of them are useless.

The worst of the lot, though, are the one who want to make a “statement.” They’re the former hippie radicals whose idealism has driven them to do inappropriate things – not for their client, but for their tremendous ego.

Apparently, David Remes is one of these lawyers.

In a recent interview with the Yemen Observer, David Remes, a Covington & Burling partner who was in Yemen working on his representation of 15 Yemeni detainees at Gitmo, told the journalist that he had “two missions” during the visit: “first to meet the families of the men that I represent in Guantanamo and second, to do what I can to promote the cause of these men.”

It was in the name of this zealous advocacy that Remes (Columbia, Harvard Law) removed his pants at a news conference on Monday.

This would be funny if it weren’t so tragic. Look at this guy. He has the vag-omach going on, the tighty-whiteys are an abomination, and his dingus is disturbingly visible.

“I’d been to Guantanamo in mid-June,” explained Remes, “and there’s a certain amount of normalcy that has settled over the normal miserable conditions of confinement, which amount to solitary confinement without sleep and without sunlight and without anyone to talk to. So at the news conference, I said that, in addition to this torment, which has become so typical that we don’t even talk about it anymore, now the torment also consists of constant body searches in which the men are required to pull their shirts up to their chest, drop their pants, and then the corn-fed U.S. military sticks their thumbs under the prisoner’s underwear band and circles the prisoner’s torsos.” Remes said these searches can take place several times in the course of a day. (H/T – The Wall Street Journal)

Wow, that is truly appalling, counselor. Imagine the gall of these corn-fed soldiers checking terrorists for weapons! (Actually, considering the price of corn these days – thank you Democrat-led Congress – they are probably Spam-fed now.) Judging from Remes’ observations, these prisoners are treated no differently than the prisoners in any police department cell room in America.

I wonder if he’ll represent all of them, too?

Topics: People I Hate | 9 Comments »