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The Force Is With Rickie La-Touche

By Wyatt Earp | November 7, 2011

The force in this case being that of his future cellmate Bubba.

30-year old Rickie La-Touche suffocated his wife with a pillow after she destroyed the Star Wars toy collection he’d been collecting since childhood. He’s been sentenced to life and will undoubtedly get his ass turned out by a gang of Sith.

“[He] told a court that his Thai wife Pornpilai Srisroy, 28, had damaged his precious Darth Vader and Luke Skywalker memorabilia. He later suffocated her during a row and then ran sobbing to his mother who lived nearby.”

Not gonna lie, Rickie, that was NOT the way of a Jedi. That was a very Vader thing of you to do. *banging gavel* Ready my sail barge – we’re heading to the sarlacc pit.

No offense, but this is clearly a case of justifiable homicide. Next!

Topics: The Job | 7 Comments »

7 Responses to “The Force Is With Rickie La-Touche”

  1. Fenway_Nation Says:
    November 7th, 2011 at 6:56 am

    “She bent my wookie”

    -Ralph Wiggum

  2. Sully Says:
    November 7th, 2011 at 6:58 am

    Such a sad story…. We can only hope that the Fet was spared.

  3. Dr. Evil Says:
    November 7th, 2011 at 8:21 am

    Pornpilai Srisoy? Was she a Twi’lek?

  4. Bob G. Says:
    November 7th, 2011 at 10:39 am

    I guess those in Thailand can’t grow to appreciate the Lucas saga the way we capitalistic Americans have over the decades…
    They just make the figures…got no love lost there, eh?

    (and wifey KNOWS to keep the hands off my “Leia in harem girl outfit” action figure)
    But, she’s always free to handle my lightsaber.
    (It’s a JEDI thing)

    (I guess that wife’s nickname was “porn”????
    That would explain a lot, too.)

    Roll safe.

  5. C/A Says:
    November 7th, 2011 at 10:48 am

    Yeah I was waiting for you to get around to this one… Imagine if he was a GI JOE collector… ;)

  6. Wyatt Earp Says:
    November 7th, 2011 at 12:59 pm

    Fenway – Such a classic line.

    Sully – No one touches the Fett Man!

    Dr. Evil – Taiwanese. Same thing.

    Bob G. – My kids play with my original Kenner figures, but they know that if they are too rough with them, I’ll go Sith on their arses.

    Captain – I imagine you’d go ballistic.

  7. Robert B. Says:
    November 7th, 2011 at 7:02 pm

    Wyatt, my Thai wife & I get along very well… I let her play with my toys anytime she wants. :)

    May that dweeb be fed to the Great Karlak.