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Hefner Taking Playboy Private

By Wyatt Earp | July 12, 2010

Heh, heh, “private.”

So what, is Hefner keeping his Playmates under lock and key? I guess he would have to so he can feast on the blood of 22-year old minxes.

According to sources, Playboy founder Hugh Hefner is planning to take the corporation private. Hef is trying to buy up all of the publicly-owned stock so he can sleep on a pile of it, with many beautiful ladies. Apparently the stock isn’t as bodacious as it once was, since there are so many different ways to see naked broads now.

Thank God for them Internets!

Hugh Hefner, Playboy Enterprises Inc.’s iconic founder, is offering to buy the shares of the media empire that he doesn’t already own and take the company private in a deal that values the organization at $185 million.

Hefner, 84, the company’s chief creative officer who’s known for his silky pajamas and young, curvaceous girlfriends, plans to team up with private equity firm Rizvi Traverse Management LLC for the deal.

Hefner founded Playboy in 1953 and turned the publication and its scantily clad models into a cultural mainstay. But in recent years, Playboy has faltered as advertising revenue dwindled and competition grew.

Yeah, competition grew. Thank God for Entenze!

Topics: Babes | 12 Comments »

12 Responses to “Hefner Taking Playboy Private”

  1. Old NFO Says:
    July 12th, 2010 at 8:03 pm

    Control is control, is control… He wants control of the “brand” and I’ll bet you will see subscription service on the Internet if he gets it.

  2. Wyatt Earp Says:
    July 12th, 2010 at 8:27 pm

    Old NFO – Good for him. It’s about fifteen years too late.

  3. Mrs. Crankipants Says:
    July 12th, 2010 at 9:18 pm

    According to the NY Times, circulation peaked at 7 million in the 70′s, and it’s now about 1.5 million.

    As much as I hate bursting your bubble, according to reports, Hef lies in bed in a Viagra stupor while the bunnies hop on top for a minute or two. And I’m sending you the bill for the brain Comet.

  4. J.Wilde Says:
    July 12th, 2010 at 9:55 pm

    Nice choice with Heather Kozar there.

  5. cbullitt Says:
    July 12th, 2010 at 10:49 pm

    Wyatt, your restraint is admirable. I figured there’d B far more puns.

  6. Woody Says:
    July 12th, 2010 at 11:00 pm


    Heather Kozar is now filed for future inclusion in the babes section of my blog. Thanks Wyatt!

  7. Ingineer66 Says:
    July 12th, 2010 at 11:39 pm

    Well with Obama and Pelosi and Reid running the show, there are a lot fewer rules about disclosure and such with a privately held corporation compared to a publicly traded company. It is likely just a business decision during the most anti-business years our country has seen.

  8. Richard McEnroe Says:
    July 13th, 2010 at 12:41 am

    I’ve been ordering generic c*i*a*l*i*s on line and plan to market it under my own brand at Professional Bull Rider events and Single Action Shooting Society matches under the brand name Wyatt Ups.

    I always took Playboy private. With all brothers and sisters I had,no way I could tie up the bathroom that long…

  9. Fenway_Nation Says:
    July 13th, 2010 at 4:40 am

    When exactly was the IPO for Playboy’s shares?

    I fogot that it was a pubicly-held company….

    /I mean publicly……

  10. Wyatt Earp Says:
    July 13th, 2010 at 10:41 am

    Mrs. Crankipants – A minute or two? Wow, better than me! I’m still jealous of the guy.

    J. Wilde – She and Miriam Gonzalez are two of my favorite Playmates.

    Cbullitt – I guess I need to bust some more out.

    Woody – She’s a definite hottie.

    Ingineer66 – Considering what Michelle looks like, I figured Obama would be opening more than a few Playboys.

    Richard – “Are you done yet???”

    Fenway – *shudders*

  11. Wes S. Says:
    July 13th, 2010 at 11:02 am

    “…I’m your private dancer, dancin’ for money/
    Do what you want me to do…”

    I got nothing.

    (Although Tina Turner has aged a lot better than Hef, hmmm?)

  12. Wyatt Earp Says:
    July 13th, 2010 at 9:27 pm

    Wes S. – Absolutely agreed!