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Look! Down On The Ground!

By Wyatt Earp | July 12, 2009

Bizarro SupermanIt’s a bird! It’s a plane!! No, it’s some douche dressed in a Superman outfit!!!

Every time I have to deal with a moron on the phone or at the division window, I think that there cannot be a worse place to work than the Philadelphia Police Department.

And then I read a story like this, and I feel much, much better.

Superman and Batman took on New York’s Finest last night in an epic Crossroads of the World battle that left the Caped Crusader in cuffs.

Stunned Times Square tourists and office workers watched agog as cops struggled to subdue Clark Kent’s alter ego without kryptonite.

“The Man of Steel didn’t go down with just two officers, it took seven officers!” witness Ryan McCormick said. “He was putting up a good fight. Little kids were like, ‘Mommy, it’s Superman!’”

It’s okay, kids. this is just Bizarro Superman.

Superman, aka Maksim Katsnelson, 23, of The Bronx, was arrested and charged with assault and resisting arrest, police said, accusing him of punching a female officer in the face while she was trying to subdue him.

The incident occurred when cops approached Katsnelson, who was panhandling, and asked him for ID. When Katsnelson said he didn’t have any ID, cops continued to ask him questions, sources said. That’s when Katsnelson punched the female officer, sources said.

“He freaked out and punched the girl cop in the face,” Batman said later. (H/TThe New York Post)

And how did that work out for ya, Superman? Hey, just because you’re “faster than a speeding bullet” in bed, doesn’t give you the right to sucker punch a female officer. Toad.

Topics: The Job, WTF? | 8 Comments »

8 Responses to “Look! Down On The Ground!”

  1. solitary knight Says:
    July 12th, 2009 at 8:48 pm

    Superman panhandling?

    Where’s Lois and Jimmy for God’s sake?

    Probably homeless too.

    Thanks President Obama.

  2. Old NFO Says:
    July 12th, 2009 at 9:38 pm

    Too bad she didn’t take his ass down… :-)

  3. RT Says:
    July 12th, 2009 at 10:10 pm

    They quoted Batman? HA!

    What an idiot.

    Glad the Wonder Twins were behaving themselves.

  4. Wyatt Earp Says:
    July 12th, 2009 at 11:52 pm

    Solitary Knight – That is the funniest comment I have read all day!

    Old NFO – That’s her head in the photo, tackling him. He’s lucky it wasn’t my former partner – she would’ve killed him.

    RT – “Form of . . . a law-abiding citizen!”

  5. Robin Says:
    July 13th, 2009 at 9:12 am

    What was the probable cause for detaining Superman to begin with? I believe the Supreme Court has determined that having ID is NOT required in the United States. Punching the policewoman was stupid, but why were they dealing with him to begin with?

  6. Wyatt Earp Says:
    July 13th, 2009 at 9:00 pm

    Robin – Good question. Then again, if you saw Superman standing on a corner, wouldn’t you ask a question or two?

  7. K Says:
    July 14th, 2009 at 4:00 am

    Wyatt and Robin -

    Ive worked a bunch of promo gigs in Times Square and there are costumed people that show up all the time. NYPD are pretty used to it I am sure. Its not like Center City where that kind of thing isnt really that common (it should be though, that would be funny). I doubt simply being in costume was the reason the officer questioned him. My personal guess would be because he didnt have a tax ID showing AND was asking for money. NYPD is pretty strict about the tax ID from what I hear.

    I hope the female officer kicked his ass btw for hitting her, I know I would have.

  8. Robin Says:
    July 14th, 2009 at 10:25 am

    Actually, if I saw someone in a Superman suit I’d probably wave and honk at him. I like to take life with a big grain of immaturity. If he didn’t have a Tax ID, he screwed up. Oh well for him.
    Life has become much more fun since I realized “you can’t help getting older, but you can be immature your whole life.” God meant us to enjoy life and appreciate what He has provided. I do my best.
    Respectfully, Robin