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Would-Be Burglar Breaks Neck In Window

By Wyatt Earp | July 22, 2008

Bawahahahahahahaha! That’s awesome!

Hold on a second.


Charles Ancrum did not succeed in breaking into a Delaware County business off I-95 over the weekend; he didn’t make it out alive, either.

Police found the 50-year-old Phoenixville resident yesterday morning hanging by his neck from the garage window of a Chester Township general-contracting company.

Township Police Chief Tim Wilson said that whoever was calling Ancrum’s cell phone obviously hadn’t seen him at least in a couple of days, because the larvae and flies indicated that his body had been rotting in the sun over the weekend.

Wilson said that Ancrum apparently had tried to break into the building on Concord Road – possibly to steal scrap metal – by standing on a sawhorse and bashing in a small window. He said Ancrum may have poked his head into the narrow opening to look for the latch to the door.

“What happened was he slipped off the horse and snapped his neck, and he was there for about two days,” Wilson said. “It was a freak accident.” (H/TThe Philadelphia Daily News)

Best story I’ve heard all week. The only way it could have been better? If this happened to the toads who stole our money at the ice rink last night.

Hey Charles, when you get to Hell, tell ‘em Wyatt sent ya!

Topics: The Job | 13 Comments »

13 Responses to “Would-Be Burglar Breaks Neck In Window”

  1. doubleplusundead Says:
    July 22nd, 2008 at 12:40 pm


  2. USA_Admiral Says:
    July 22nd, 2008 at 12:49 pm

    Justice is served.

  3. Deanna Says:
    July 22nd, 2008 at 12:57 pm

    Quick and swift justice.

  4. Rick Says:
    July 22nd, 2008 at 1:00 pm

    It is a shame more of these punks do not end up this way.

  5. Bloviating Zeppelin Says:
    July 22nd, 2008 at 2:00 pm

    I LOVE a story with a happy ending! >sigh<


  6. Ky Person Says:
    July 22nd, 2008 at 2:13 pm

    Dumb. Really dumb. My son is a salesman to factories and he says they have to be on their guard since metal theft (especially copper) is a big problem.

  7. insolublog Says:
    July 22nd, 2008 at 2:57 pm

    Why did it take a whole fifty years for this mensa genius to convert himself into a host for a larva colony? The price of freedom: you can’t cull the herd.

  8. RT Says:
    July 22nd, 2008 at 3:24 pm

    I love the added detail of decomposition and missed phone calls. Heh.

  9. BobG Says:
    July 22nd, 2008 at 3:27 pm

    Hope he doesn’t have any survivors; some shyster would be talking them into a lawsuit against the business.

  10. leoni2 Says:
    July 22nd, 2008 at 3:57 pm

    My, the flies must’ve been real thick in the area to be using him as a meal so quickly. Hee hee hee.

  11. Mope Says:
    July 22nd, 2008 at 6:41 pm

    Those poor flies.

  12. Wyatt Earp Says:
    July 22nd, 2008 at 6:46 pm

    Doubleplusundead – Flawless victory!

    Admiral – In hot, steaming bowls!

    Deanna – Think of the lessening burden of the taxpayers.

    Rick – Can’t get rid of all of them. They represent hours of OT for me and my co-workers.

    BZ – Makes you feel all warm and fuzzy inside, doesn’t it?

    Ky person – 30% of our burglaries anymore are for copper piping.

    Insol – I heard he was a blogger and had twice the visits a day as I do. Damn.

    RT – “I’m sorry, I can’t answer the phone right now. I’m a little ‘hung up’ at work.” HA!

    BobG – Oh, and open and shut case. The business should be left open for burglars and thieves.

    Leoni2 – Luckily, they don’t eat much. Heh.

  13. Wyatt Earp Says:
    July 22nd, 2008 at 6:47 pm

    Mope – Nice!