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Archive for July, 2008

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Greyhound: You Should “Beheading” To Us!

Thursday, July 31st, 2008

Remind me to never sit next to this guy. I have been told I snore. (CNN) — As horrified travelers watched, a Greyhound Canada bus passenger repeatedly stabbed and then decapitated a young man who was sitting and sleeping beside him, a witness said Thursday. “There was a bloodcurdling scream. I was just reading my [...]

True Detective Stories

Thursday, July 31st, 2008

I knew I should have taken the entire week off sick. So, last night I was sitting in work, lamenting the fact that I couldn’t bring in my bag of frozen peas, when the phone rang. This is the actual conversation I had to endure: Wyatt: “Detective Division, may I help you?” Complainant: “Yes, where [...]

A Message From The Author

Thursday, July 31st, 2008

Gentlemen, please take note: this is what happens when you don’t take your wife out as often as you used to. Actually, the missus has been fighting Kevin’s cradle cap, and found that the Mohawk was the best way to comb everything out. And, to be honest, I think the ‘do is a riot. Relax, [...]

Navy Relieves Captain After Carrier Fire

Thursday, July 31st, 2008

Events like these will get people thinking that the Washington is cursed. WASHINGTON (CNN) — The U.S. Navy fired the captain and executive officer of the nuclear-powered aircraft carrier George Washington on Wednesday because of a massive fire that damaged the ship in May, Navy officials said. Capt. David C. Dykhoff and his executive officer, [...]

Saudi Arabia Bans Cats And Dogs

Thursday, July 31st, 2008

Well, what happens when it rains? RIYADH (AFP) – Saudi Arabia’s religious police have announced a ban on selling cats and dogs as pets, or walking them in public in the Saudi capital, because of men using them as a means of making passes at women, an official said on Wednesday. Othman al-Othman, head of [...]

Gillian Anderson: Idiot

Wednesday, July 30th, 2008

I can’t believe I used to like this broad. Actress GILLIAN ANDERSON has discovered the secret behind former U.S. President BILL CLINTON’s sex appeal – lingering eye contact. The X-Files star was shocked to find herself falling under Clinton’s spell when they met recently, and she’s convinced every woman he meets experiences the same thing. [...]

Humpday History Highlight

Wednesday, July 30th, 2008

July 30, 1945 – The USS Indianapolis Torpedoed On this day in 1945, the USS Indianapolis is torpedoed by a Japanese submarine and sinks within minutes in shark-infested waters. Only 317 of the 1,196 men on board survived. However, the Indianapolis had already completed its major mission: the delivery of key components of the atomic [...]

McDonald’s To Power Manila’s Police Cars

Wednesday, July 30th, 2008

Get ready for the MickeyD P.D. God help us. MANILA (AFP) – Police in Manila are looking to convert their patrol cars to run on a mixture of diesel and used cooking oil from McDonald’s, officials and the company said Tuesday. With oil prices at crippling highs, the project would convert cars in the Makati [...]

Nutter Ousts Head Of Minority Council

Wednesday, July 30th, 2008

Wow. I wonder if he’ll be called an Uncle Tom for his efforts? As a likely first step toward transforming the city’s minority business program, Mayor Nutter has asked its leader, Carolyn Nichols, to resign on Thursday. Nichols was named director of the Minority Business Enterprise Council more than two years ago by Mayor John [...]

Jerry Lewis Detained For Gun In Luggage

Tuesday, July 29th, 2008

HEY LADY!!! LOS ANGELES (Reuters) – Comedian Jerry Lewis was detained by police in Las Vegas late last week when airport screeners found an unloaded gun in his baggage, authorities said on Tuesday. Lewis, 82, had a small .22-caliber handgun when he arrived at the security screening area on Friday at Las Vegas McCarran International [...]

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