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Woman Brands Date With Hot Iron

By Wyatt Earp | June 14, 2008

This broad is not attractive enough to be this crazy.

I wonder if he was labeled “permanent press?”

NEW YORK (AP) — A college student who branded a date’s body with a scalding piece of metal as payback for never calling her after they had sex was sentenced to five years in prison Friday.

Maybe that’s why he never called her: she is obviously a lunatic.

Kristina Caban, 23, had no comment as state Supreme Court Justice Michael Obus sentenced her for what he called a crime that was “not remotely justifiable.”

Assistant District Attorney Nicole Blumberg told Obus that Caban was the “mastermind behind the plan” to sear the torso of Samir “Sammy” Sara, then 23, for having sex with her once in 2004 and never calling her again.

I guess no one ever told Kristina that this is what guy’s do. It’s not our fault. It’s ingrained into our DNA. (For the record, I am kidding. Please do not send me hot irons in the mail.)

Caban enlisted new boyfriend Robert Testagrossa to help brand a four-inch-high “R” on Samir’s abdomen in October 2006, the prosecutor said. She said Caban lured the former lover to a hotel room, where Testagrossa and another man grabbed him.

Blumberg said the men used a Taser to immobilize Sara in a room at the Chelsea Inn while Caban laughed at his distress and kicked him while he was down.

The branding “iron” was actually a length of metal wire fashioned into a “R” — heated, and applied to Samir’s torso, said Tracy Golden of the Manhattan district attorney’s office. She said prosecutors did not know what the “R” stood for. (H/T - CNN via RT)

I’m sure Kristina would say it stood for “Rat Bastard,” but Samir would probably think it means “Run.” As in RUN away from crazy bitches carrying flaming pieces of twisted metal!

(H/T - Jim)

Topics: The Job |

9 Responses to “Woman Brands Date With Hot Iron”

  1. Kim Says:
    June 14th, 2008 at 6:45 pm

    So many sarcastic comments, so little time.

  2. Jennifer Gallagher Says:
    June 14th, 2008 at 7:09 pm

    I hope Samir Sara has learned his lesson about choosing sex partners. “R” was probably the only letter Kristina knew how to make.

  3. Wyatt Earp Says:
    June 14th, 2008 at 7:31 pm

    Kim - Sarcasm is welcome here. Flame on!

    Jennifer - Maybe she was a pirate? Heh.

  4. Kim Says:
    June 14th, 2008 at 9:54 pm

    My only question is if she was looking for revenge, why not brand him where it would leave a more memorable impression? Was she not able to get his pants down far enough?

  5. RT Says:
    June 14th, 2008 at 10:52 pm


    I can’t imagine being that angry with someone.

    She realizes if she had acted like a lady she wouldn’t be going gonzo over a one-night-stand, doesn’t she?

  6. GroovyVic Says:
    June 15th, 2008 at 8:10 am

    “Maybe she was a pirate?”


  7. XBradTC Says:
    June 15th, 2008 at 4:56 pm

    Holy shit! I should have the whole alphabet by now! And what’s up with the two losers with her in the motel.

    Yeah, honey, that sounds like a great idea. We’ll tase him and hold him down and inflict permanent damage to him. What better way to spend a Saturday evening! Better than watching “The Happening!”

  8. Miss Mud Puddle Says:
    June 16th, 2008 at 9:19 am

    No doubt XBradTC is a man-whore.

    Maybe she should have asked Carrie Underwood how she would have handled the situation…she’s got a song for just about every type of revenge you could throw at a man…

  9. USA_Admiral Says:
    June 16th, 2008 at 10:29 am

    She must have been a lousy lay.