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Humpday History Highlight

By Wyatt Earp | April 20, 2011

April 19, 2011 – Skynet Launches Attack On Humanity

According to the Terminator franchise, at 8:11 PM today (April 19th), the military-designed artificial intelligence system called Skynet will become self-aware and turn against its creators (read: us). If that doesn’t have you shaking in your boots…our world will be overwhelmed by a legion of killer robots in approximately 48 hours – a time known as Judgment Day. I, for one, welcome our new robot overloads.

Okay, I’m a day late with this, and my computer still seems to be operating normally. That may just be a ruse, though. I suggest you all arm yourselves and smash/shoot/destroy everything in your home with a computer chip.

Go! NOW!!!

Topics: HHH | 19 Comments »

19 Responses to “Humpday History Highlight”

  1. Dustyvet Says:
    April 20th, 2011 at 6:48 pm

    My DVD player just bit my cat!!!!

  2. Wyatt Earp Says:
    April 20th, 2011 at 6:54 pm

    Dustyvet – Bite it back!

  3. Loaded Dice in Vegas Says:
    April 20th, 2011 at 7:11 pm

    Becoming a Luddite is the answer……..

    What was the question???????????

  4. dr. evil Says:
    April 20th, 2011 at 7:40 pm

    When the zombies/machines/ etc apocalypse occurs you’ll all wish you knew a well-armed psychopath like me! I mean, I have sniping points picked out and my ‘LAST STAND’ area drawn up.

    Ah hell…if you can make it to parkesburg when it hits I’ll shelter you free loaders. (I’ll need someone to work in the garden)

  5. Ingineer66 Says:
    April 20th, 2011 at 7:42 pm

    Maybe this is why I have not heard from my buddy the gun nut today when I texted him to ask if he wants to get a beer with the rest of us after work. He is probably locked down in his house with a bunch of loaded rifles and the battery out of his cell phone.

  6. Wyatt Earp Says:
    April 20th, 2011 at 7:44 pm

    LDIV – I don’t remember. TV rips my attention span.

    Dr. Evil – Lucky for me, I know you. And if you don’t let me in, the Evil Artist will.

    Ingineer66 – DIDN’T YOU HEAR! SKYNET ATTACKED!!!

  7. John D Says:
    April 20th, 2011 at 7:57 pm

    I don’t sweat Skynet. I’ll just wait until it’s busy downloading software updates, then I’ll pull the plug.

  8. proof Says:
    April 20th, 2011 at 8:37 pm

    I don’t remember which of the sequels it was, but it was revealed that Skynet became sentient because of the sheer volume of interconnected computers around the world.

    Anyone remember what happened next? Beuller? Beuller??

    They began killing off the human race…

    …with atomic bombs, around the world…

    …which put off tremendous EMPs… (Say it with me!)

    …which kill electronic devices… like computers. Murder/suicide pact, anyone?

    How “Skynet” survived their initial “attack” is not logical.

    But time travel, on the other hand, is totally believable!

  9. proof Says:
    April 20th, 2011 at 8:38 pm

    Oh, and speaking of evil computer networks, Obama is now on Facebook…

  10. lou Says:
    April 20th, 2011 at 8:40 pm

    Was it just me, or did anyone else think that with 20 or 30 rounds of AP, terminator could have been a whole different movie?

    “Oh no, the terminator!”
    *Shoots it in the head with a nice armor-piercing round*
    “So, you wanna get some coffee or something?”

    We all know that Reese only came back to sleep with Linda Hamilton anyway.

  11. Wyatt Earp Says:
    April 20th, 2011 at 8:48 pm

    Proof – And they send someone back, but destroy the machine to come back. Then terminators come back in two more films and a TV series.

    Lou – Hot naked Linda Hamilton. Mmm . . .

  12. Jon Brooks Says:
    April 20th, 2011 at 11:35 pm

    Some big dude came to my door asking for Sarah Connor
    I told him she had plastic and transgender surgery and now goes by the name Barack Hussien Obama and lives in Washington. He wanted to rip my phone book apart and keep a few pages but I gave him a GPS instead. Did I do good?

  13. Skip Says:
    April 20th, 2011 at 11:59 pm

    I just shot my watch. Damn that hurt.
    Prolly shoulda took it off first.

  14. Fenway_Nation Says:
    April 21st, 2011 at 7:06 am

    well,,,,nice knowing all of you

  15. Wes S. Says:
    April 21st, 2011 at 10:01 am

    So the world ended Tuesday and the Terminators are coming, huh?

    Bummer. I knew I should have bought a Barrett .50 when I had the chance…

    Oh well. Guess I’ll just wait a couple of years and scrounge up one of those phased plasma rifles in the forty-megawatt range for my anti-Terminator needs. ;)

  16. Wyatt Earp Says:
    April 21st, 2011 at 11:39 am

    Jon – My man!

    Skip – Maybe they’ll give you a robotic wrist? If so, you’re doomed.

    Fenway – It’s been a fun ride!

    Wes S. – “Hey, just what you see on the shelf, pal.”

  17. dragonlady474 Says:
    April 21st, 2011 at 4:37 pm

    I was going to make some crack about my nightstand drawer buzzing, but thought better of it. Good thing I didn’t. :)

  18. Wyatt Earp Says:
    April 21st, 2011 at 4:46 pm

    DL474 – Oh yeah, we would have had a field day!

  19. Bob G. Says:
    April 22nd, 2011 at 8:42 pm

    Wyatt:
    I’ll take my cue from the Malcolm Reynolds book of self-preservation:
    “Anyone tries to kill you, you try and kill em’ right back.”
    (goes for electronics, too)
    Always seems to work for me.

    ;)

    Roll safe.

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