Training Day
By Wyatt Earp | August 12, 2008
I am convinced that the art of saving lives drives one to take his own.
Every year, police officers have to be re-certified in topics such as legal updates, firearms training, and either first aid or CPR. Yesterday, I spent eight boring, boobless hours in CPR – and there was no alcohol served.
Look, I know that CPR is very important – Ambulance Driver is probably yelling at his computer screen as he reads this – but when you stretch the re-cert out for eight long hours, and utilize terribly boring police officers posing as instructors, it’s enough to kill yourself via AED.
I am no expert, but after being trained (and re-certified) over the course of 14 years, I am pretty sure that the entire training (including the videos and the test) could take about three hours, tops. The other five hours? Time wasters, man.
There, I said it.
Topics: The Job | 13 Comments »
August 12th, 2008 at 5:48 pm
But if you got to practice CPR on Jessica Biel I bet you would say it wasn’t nearly enough time.
P.S. How do I get my avitor to show up when I make comments?
August 12th, 2008 at 7:02 pm
3-4 hours max for a retraining session is all that is really required. I can teach and ENTIRE class in 8 hours, including demos…
August 12th, 2008 at 7:42 pm
Boobless? But, you were there.
August 12th, 2008 at 9:16 pm
Momster – You need to go to gravatar.com and get a free one. You can download your own. Then, be sure to use the e-mail you used to sign up at that site. Done!
Old NFO – Without lunch, it comes to about seven hours, but damn, there has to be a quicker way!
RT – Shut it.
August 12th, 2008 at 9:35 pm
Ambulance Driver ain’t the only one yelling,…..
August 12th, 2008 at 10:11 pm
Who was your “Instructor”?
I had the Lt. who tells the same stories, but changes from a first person account, to a “young Officer” every other year.
This year it was “A young Officer and his Wife were dining at Outback Steak House…..” Last year it was, “I was in Albuquerque when someone dining next to me began to choke”. Hearing the same fictitious stories, in the most boring class I’ve ever been in, made me wish I was choking.
August 13th, 2008 at 1:00 am
Cheer up, Wyatt! You coulda had this class:
August 13th, 2008 at 1:02 am
Cheer up Wyatt! You could have been stuck in this class.
August 13th, 2008 at 1:27 am
That video is creepy and hilarious!
I think because it was in German it made it funnier.
August 13th, 2008 at 8:15 am
Ah; the price you have to pay for gainful employment.
August 13th, 2008 at 10:48 am
You didn’t use tongue, did you?
August 13th, 2008 at 11:18 am
Trek – Sorry, but there’s no reason this refresher should take 8 hours. No reason at all.
Wagonsux – Had the Lt for the first half, and a morbidly obese, humorless woman for the second. They should give this training to the prisoners at Gitmo to gain confessions.
Ambulance Driver – You ain’t right!
Admiral – I know it’s a necessary evil, but it could be less evil if the administration used their heads once in a while.
Doghouse – A little bit. The mannequin was kinda hot.
August 15th, 2008 at 12:20 pm
You get paid for it. Suck it up.